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Scramble!
Ok, this journal is going to be scrambled since I'm still reeling from the breakup. I'll bring up my inner thoughts on the matter later on after I let you in on my day. First things first, I woke up at 11:30. Shortly after I was torn between eating first or brushing my teeth. We all know that if you brush your teeth then eat the food just won't taste the same, ya know? So, I brushed my teeth regardless, I don't for hours after I wake up anyway. Weird, yes. Well, I think it's a psychological thing. My dad yelled a lot and he dished out the belt whenever we were bad. Trust me, the kinder, nicer, more calm Robert you see today used to be blunt to the point of hurting my own mom's feelings and being rough with my tender-hearted little brother Joseph. Ya, I used to slap him upside the head and call him dumb when he said...dumb things. I don't do that anymore, so no PM's. Moving right along, I got the belt the most. Man, I had it bad when I was child. I look back and I am thankful for that, I'd be much, much worse without it. I never did answer why I don't like going out until hours later. Basically, I guess I don't "like" being around him and it makes me uncomfortable. I don't hate him at all, but, I am just not used to him. Yes, even years later. It is tragic. He commented to my mother that he wonders why my brothers and I never talk to him or come to him with our problems. I, myself, am strong and don't feel the need to share my feelings with my parents. I don't want to burden them anymore then they are right now financially. I dare not ask them for money, no, not me. I'll work for my own or save and not buy anything than rather accept money happily. If they give me a 5'er I'll accept, but just about every time, I ask "Why?" Enough of delving too far into my brain. I don't like bringing out my more sensitive side, that is reserved for true friends and loved ones>_>. Afterward, I watched my brother play Skies of Arcadia for 2 hours and almost napped on him. Man, watching him play that and RPG's in general put me in sleep. I blame it on Final Fantasy 7. First game to ever have that effect on me. When he was done, I got on to play Dragon Ball Z: Budokai Tenkaichi 3 like I do whenever I have the need to beat something or take out some excess energy. Gosh, I get so into that game, I feed off the energy. When I get into "Exchange of blows" which is when they throw fists of fury at each other, I just put all I have into trouncing the enemy. I love the intensity of it. The hand-to-hand combat is what I crave. Enough warmongering for now. I had to stop mid-match to watch Ghost Adventures, once of the best shows on Travel Channel. I'm SO into paranormal investigation. I know that ghost, spirits, and the like exist. Because I know they exist, I want to hear stories and experiences on TV and from others who have first-hand accounts. Right, so, Laura totally distracted me from my misery and I can't even think or be emo,ugh. Sorry. I do really miss her, and if she took my back, I wouldn't make another mistake. Life sucks. FML Gaia!
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