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The AfterStuff of D Kyzer
I guess it SHOULD be afterMATH, but math bores me. Stuff is cool. This is a place where my insanity goes. (Or at least some of it.) There may be a little bit of quotable thinking here, but those moments will probably be few and far between.
Lying
Hello, and welcome back to the AfterStuff! We've got another request. This one's from Mythical Illusion, and it's about Lying. Mystical has a friend, who has a huge lying problem. Let me start off by saying that lying is not a good thing. You always get caught sooner or later, and it can have really bad effects on your social life. It's really hard to avoid lying sometimes, I slip up, myself. That being said...

It seems that what really needs to be told here is how to deal with liars. Liars will get on your nerves, they'll betray your trust, they'll even lie to you when it's not something worth lying about. They will lie to you. You've just got to learn how to deal with it until you get a chance to help. When they lie to you, and you know it, ask them the same question one more time. If they stick to their story, then they will at least feel bad about it (unless they're a sociopath). If not, you know that you're getting to them. Take that opportunity to talk to them about it. I can't tell you what to say here, because everyone's different, and different people will respond to different things. There's no substitute for a friend intervening, because they, simply, know the person well. They'll be able to strike the right spots in an intervention. Another time for talking to them about it is right after they get caught. They'll be experiencing the negative effects of lying, and that can be a vital part of helping them change their lives. If you're friends with a liar, try to get their other friends in on the help. Have them hang out with the person, and make sure to catch them in lies. Don't have them tell the person being lied to about it, but have them talk to the liar, GENTLY getting onto them. If they get too harsh about it, the liar will stop thinking of them as friends. That will not be a good thing, because you'll be losing valuable leverage on your friend, the liar.

There's nothing that will help a liar more than a little bit of help, maybe a little bit of "Tsk-tsk", and a whole lot of care. When they figure out that lying isn't helping them as much as it hurts them, they might be able to turn around on their own... but it is much more likely that they'll be able to do it if they get help. Be the help. Sometimes, you're the only one that will.





 
 
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