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The AfterStuff of D Kyzer
I guess it SHOULD be afterMATH, but math bores me. Stuff is cool. This is a place where my insanity goes. (Or at least some of it.) There may be a little bit of quotable thinking here, but those moments will probably be few and far between.
Lying
Hello, and welcome back to the AfterStuff! We've got another request. This one's from Mythical Illusion, and it's about Lying. Mystical has a friend, who has a huge lying problem. Let me start off by saying that lying is not a good thing. You always get caught sooner or later, and it can have really bad effects on your social life. It's really hard to avoid lying sometimes, I slip up, myself. That being said...

It seems that what really needs to be told here is how to deal with liars. Liars will get on your nerves, they'll betray your trust, they'll even lie to you when it's not something worth lying about. They will lie to you. You've just got to learn how to deal with it until you get a chance to help. When they lie to you, and you know it, ask them the same question one more time. If they stick to their story, then they will at least feel bad about it (unless they're a sociopath). If not, you know that you're getting to them. Take that opportunity to talk to them about it. I can't tell you what to say here, because everyone's different, and different people will respond to different things. There's no substitute for a friend intervening, because they, simply, know the person well. They'll be able to strike the right spots in an intervention. Another time for talking to them about it is right after they get caught. They'll be experiencing the negative effects of lying, and that can be a vital part of helping them change their lives. If you're friends with a liar, try to get their other friends in on the help. Have them hang out with the person, and make sure to catch them in lies. Don't have them tell the person being lied to about it, but have them talk to the liar, GENTLY getting onto them. If they get too harsh about it, the liar will stop thinking of them as friends. That will not be a good thing, because you'll be losing valuable leverage on your friend, the liar.

There's nothing that will help a liar more than a little bit of help, maybe a little bit of "Tsk-tsk", and a whole lot of care. When they figure out that lying isn't helping them as much as it hurts them, they might be able to turn around on their own... but it is much more likely that they'll be able to do it if they get help. Be the help. Sometimes, you're the only one that will.






User Comments: [13]
joolee_monkey23
Community Member





Mon Jan 07, 2008 @ 02:51am


hey its me joolee and this is a response to this entry, well a questional response. i wanted to know what if the person is a big liar and she lies to make people think she is cool. but one time she said something and it seemed like a lie but what if it really wasn't? how would you know she really is telling the truth even though she lies a lot? i don't want to accuse someone of lying if they didn't but the sattement seemed like a lie?


joolee_monkey23
Community Member





Mon Jan 07, 2008 @ 02:58am


go here now! i want you to read the first to last post(credits) PEN.PAPER.MONKEY
please don't post just PM me if you want to reply.


iMythy
Community Member





Mon Jan 07, 2008 @ 03:15am


Emotions are naught to be tormented


Thanks Kyzer. ^^ This is a big help. 3nodding

And keep up the good work!



for they can kill a person in more ways than one


CrystalShyner
Community Member





Mon Jan 07, 2008 @ 03:26am


Interesting. I don't remember having a friend who lied a lot, because I usually stay away from those people. Ahem. Anyway, this must be helpful to whoever asked the advice. Don't have much to say here, but I'm glad you're helping others out with their problems or issues.


deleteagent48
Community Member





Mon Jan 07, 2008 @ 03:41am


I've got the same, or at least similar, problem that Joolee has. A friend of mine, is apparantly a liar. Since I'm in a new school (freshman) and no one knows her from any time before, it would give her an easy excuse to lie, to become cool. Another friend of mine is the one who assumes that she's a liar with the way she talks to her about certain things (having gone to Europe before or something) and since I trust the accuser a whole lot, I'm wondering what I should believe of the accused. Any ideas?


D Kyzer
Community Member





Mon Jan 07, 2008 @ 03:48am


Well, I find that asking a liar the same question twice in a row will let them think that you know that they're lying. They'll stick to the story if it's true, or if they're stubborn. Past that, though, there are many secrets to finding a liar out. I don't know any of them, though... sweatdrop As far as your situation goes, Heidi, I would suggest that you listen to the accuser a little bit. Most liars can't keep up a good background story for long. If she's lying, it'll make itself apparent after some time. Remind the accuser that people can change, if they look down upon you for listening.


filipino_wolf_grl
Community Member





Mon Jan 07, 2008 @ 04:45am


Great entry ^.^ I think I have a topic in mind now

@Joolee: I think I know who your talking about


-M a i k a i - U h a n e-
Community Member





Wed Jan 09, 2008 @ 01:30am


This is really great! Congrats on another great topic. ^^


joolee_monkey23
Community Member





Wed Jan 16, 2008 @ 02:50am


@filipino_wolf_grl :: i know what you mean. its obviously one of the twins. but guess which one! ooo! i like twin #1 better than #2 but they still lie alot. but i don't when they are telling the truth.


Roxas lover
Community Member





Sat Jan 26, 2008 @ 06:55am


dude, you are wayyyyyy too good at this.
I have another question....but I will send it in a pm....if I remember.....lol.


lonewolfs_sis
Community Member





Sun Nov 30, 2008 @ 04:25am


....okayz?


User Comments: [13]
 
 
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