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Pain in another's eyes...


Have you ever felt the guilt of a thousand suns burning on your back?Have you ever felt like you deserved the pain that torments your nightmares?Do you feel the wrath of the thousands of demons breathing down your neck?Can you feel the presence of the one you have hurt?Do you see the tears behind her smile?You see a strong and healthy non-depressed girl.But I don't see what you see.I see through that illussion.I see her tears.I see the heart that I destroyed with my own hands and my own curse.I watch helplessly as the tears fall.I wait thousands of years to see them hit the ground.I want to run to her.To tell her I'm sorry.But my legs won't move.I'm frozen.I can't help her.This barrior has me locked in.I can't reach her.And before I know it...shes dead.The pain is to great.The blood.Why?I scream as loud as I can but she doesn't move.She is dead.I can't ever feel the warmth of her touch again.I will never see her smile or tell her that it was my fault and that I am sorry.So now I must punish myself.I disappionted her.I promised her I would always protect her.But I couldn't.I brought the tears to her eyes and the suffering,that I will never forgive myself for.So once again, I will lock myself in.I will love no one, as it should be.I will never hurt anyone again.So now I am withering away.I am the next to die in this God forsaken world.I smile when I see you and will always laugh.I will never show you what is behind this mask of death.You will never see my blood stained face.Not until I die.Not until the grip of the reaper has me in his arms in hell.Not until the mask sees that there is no breath left in this body.You won't see me until I die.Morning will come with out me one day.I will never see the sun nor feel it's warmth again.I will for now suffer in eternal silence.Until at last we meet in the eternal pitts of hell...