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In some ways, it's kind of strange when I look back at my life so far.
I'm looking to find that moment when I changed from the hopeful person
that I was into the person I am now. Yet, somehow, I can't seem to find that
marked the change in me. It seems as if the change was gradual even though
I couldn't see it at the time. Slowly, my hope faded, replaced instead with
feelings of responsibility and anger. I know that those two feelings don't go
together, but somehow, I feel them both. I no longer hope for a good outcome,
but I rather feel that it is my responsibility to ensure it. It's hard to try and carry
the burdens of the world on your shoulders, sometimes however, I think that
if I don't go on such task, how could I expect it to be done by someone else?
Sacrifice is something that I became accustomed to for the past years. Giving
up my happiness to fight for some other cause freater than myself. So much,
so that sometimes, I can't even tell when I'm happy or just faking a smile...