• What is my life without love? What is my point without Heatred?What am I still doing here?

    I was 15 and still ugly. My mother always said that my body isn't ugly, just going through changes. But I knew she thought I was ugly. For my mom never touched me, never gave me a good night kiss. Never said wow honey you look beautiful today. And she never said I love you...I knew it, I was ugly, a discrace, and to my mom I was a hidious monster. I knew all these things, because although it's not right for a human to remeber these things, when I was just the age of 2... My mother said it, right to my face, I had droped my cup, and spilled it every where. My mother reached out and smacked my face with a paddle, she screamed in furrry "You stupid, ugly, disgusting butt weed! You spilled the juice!" I never forgot those words. Stupid and ugly...

    My father ,who died when I was young, always told me that I was the most beautiful girl in the world. He always kissed me goodnight, and gave me a hug, and even played dress up with me. But yet when I turned 14... My beauty went away, And I knew it because, when I was 13... two weeks away from my birth day, My father died. And when 14 hit. I stopped. No more beauty, no more me.... Just those simple words my mother had said to me... Stupid and ugly.

    I didn't go to his funeral, my mother didn't want me to. But I think that If I had went I could have said goodbye to him. one last time. And if maybe I said goodbye. Maybe his spirit could have come out and told me that I was beautiful...

    Fate just is what you have to live with. It's what killed my father, what made me ugly, and what made my mother hate me. Fate is just about to kill me and when it does I know nobody will want to come to my funeral. To an ugly girls funeral.

    Jessica died: November 25, 2008, a car ran into her while she was walking home from her job.

    Jessica was 15, just like me... She had long brown hair, and beautiful hazel grren eyes. Her actual name was Jesina, but everybosy thought her name sounded more like Jessica. She was a straight A+ student. And never missed a day of school since she was in kinder-garten.

    Most importantly, she was, and always will be, my best friend. She wrote every word of this in her diary since she was 7. I only actually out her most important days in this diary entry. But I felt like I should share it with all of you, and let you all know that, if you think you had, or have it bad... your not like her, and your lucky.

    Her mother was put up in an insane hospital, for hitting her child several times. And for child abuse. She had said that her daughter, is still alive, just ran away. That's what got her there!

    I still visit her grave stone, everyday, she is placed right next to her father. And every year on their birth day's I take there favorite things and talk to there graves till the sun goes down.

    I actually never had a real friend... but in the end I guess I did, Jessica...

    The most beautiful women in the world.

    She was the most beautiful girl you would ever meet. It was just her fate that was ugly.