• Chapter One: (Memory)

    Math class…

    I never liked it. It was always boring and I would always end up falling asleep. I knew the material, it wasn’t hard or anything. The class was just boring as Hell but everybody loved the teacher. She was sexy to all the men but I didn’t care as much.

    One day, my boredom ceased for that whole class and I hated it, or so I thought. Well my mind wanted to reject the idea and his actions but my body…Why must mind and body be two totally different things? I hated that class even more since that day. It was so…Unreal. It brought back intense pain that I’d never want to feel again. However, another took that pain away and gave me something that I longed for, love.

    So maybe it wasn’t that bad.

    “Well good afternoon class. Today we have a pop quiz on yesterday’s material. I hope you all payed attention yesterday! Finals are approaching soon you know!” Ms. Shimizu said.

    She passed the quizzes out with a graceful manner, many male students stared at her with awe because she was that beautiful. The females were somewhat jealous however Ms. Shimizu is a likeable person. She’s somewhat soft spoken and she’s so not the stereotype slutty teacher that loves high school boys. Ms. Shimizu is single with no children, but she treats us all as if we were. She does seem to have the potential of being a wonderful mother.

    She walked to the last desk by the window. “I’m sure you’ll pass Akira, it won’t really count as a grade but still…” Her voice was gentle as the breeze outside, it made me somewhat nostalgic of my younger days. Before my mother became drowned in her own job, she would actually take the time to be a real mom. She’d read to me and my twin brother, sing us to sleep. She’d tell interesting stories that were all but real. However those days are gone and I don’t seem to care about it now. Life goes on with or without her. I smile at Ms. Shimizu and look down at the paper as she walks away. I look down at the questions. “Easy.” I whisper to myself and finish the quiz in less than 3 minutes.

    So I now sit there, bored. I lay my head down on the desk and into a slumber of silence, or at least I wish I did.

    “Awww. How adorable, just look at my little Akira trying to sleep…” A voice said. His lips brushed against my ear.

    I gasp and sit up immediately at those words and the voice. I knew very damn well whose voice that belonged to. I look behind me to see him…Ren…

    “W-what do you want.” Attempting to sound poised and like I didn’t want him here, but I….felt somewhat happy to see him.

    He smiled at me, with those sky blue eyes…God he looked so…No! Bad thoughts! Mustn’t think like that! B-but…

    His face took notice on how I was staring at him. I must’ve looked like I was admiring him or something…And with that angelic voice of his, which I will never admit that he has one, spoke to me again.

    “Well you already know what I want. What I want is….What I want is you Akira, more than anything else. You are the reason for why I ‘live’.” Ren then pressed his lips against mine and it felt so good, then he licked them like he would always. My reaction to it was soft, slow moaning. I was loosing control and then he began to French kiss me, oh God.

    “N-no, no, no, no, no...” I break the kiss, pushing him away. “N-no! I won’t submit to your tricks that make me weaken! I won’t succumb to body pleasures…” I stop there thinking about what I just said. I always say I won’t be taken over by Ren’s sensitive touches and his heart capturing voice, but I fail ever so miserably

    “You always say that to me Akira, but in the end I always win and we both leave happy.”

    “Since when do I leave happy!?”

    “I heard that you were happy all day on Saturday after we ‘had fun’ in the abandoned boys bathroom at school. So you really did like that hand job.”

    My face turns into an incredibly dark shade of red and I turn away. “Oh God just shut the Hell up and go away! You’re not even here five minutes and you’re already raising my blood pressure! Enough!”

    We were then silent for a short while. It was quite bugging me so I turned around only to find his face extremely close to mine.

    “Don’t deny what you really want.” He whispered seductively. “You’re so bored because you finished that quiz so damn early. So now you wanna be kept entertained for the rest of the class. I can help with that, like always.”

    Ren was so right. I am bored and I want him here with me. I enjoy when he’s with me but I could never admit that. And just maybe…just maybe, for once I’d want him to take me right here in the class. Dream or not, he could have me…maybe. Stupid internal conflict.

    “I…I…” It sucks being at a loss for words. Once again, I was unable to do anything about what was going to happen. And so, his voice spoke to me. Oh Ren…

    “You don’t have to say anything.” He tilted my chin up with those delicate fingers and pressed his soft lips against my very own. I close my eyes, thinking about somebody else. I still wish sometimes that these lips touching mine weren’t Ren’s. I wish there were his. Not Ren, but another. He was…

    “Akira, why are you crying…? Do you want me stop? I will…if you want me to.” Ren spoke, breaking the sweet kiss of pain.

    I didn’t notice that I began to cry when I thought of that somebody else. He, the one I used to love most, would always make me cry. He’d make me want to tear my insides apart, other times he’d make me so happy that I could die. After lost in thought, I recovered from my thinking intently. I sniffled a little, trying to regain my composure. I tried to sound like I was alright, but I kept stuttering.

    “It’s…It’s nothing! K-keep going if you want to, I won’t mind.” In case you’re wondering, this is a dream. I actually did fall asleep but whenever I dream, Ren appears and crazy stuff starts happening. Ren turned my chair so I could face his body. He nearly had a melancholic look on that angelic face of his. However after a moment of silence, Ren ginned and sat on my lap.

    “That’s a first. Whatever is making you cry has changed you. So you won’t tell Ren? Ren wants to know…So that Ren can take the pain away. Ren doesn’t want God giving Ren an easily submissive Akira.” He licked the tears away from my cheeks. My eyes closed and I wanted to cry even more.

    “Stop talking in third person. You sound like an annoying child.” But I loved it anyhow. As long as I could hear his voice, anybody’s voice, saying they loved me or anything, I could be happy. Even if the love wasn’t real, I would want that temporary happiness.

    “Shhh. It’ll be okay Akira.” He pulled me closer to his chest and stroked me hair. “I’ll make the pain disappear.” Ren was so warm. He always knew what to say. He’s always there when I need him, just like my brother.

    “Oh Ren…I’m sorry.” I spoke softly, softly as I ever could. His gentle smile took my breath away at an instant. And after that breathtaking smile, he touched my lips again.