• The phone rang, shocking me out of my thoughts. I picked it up carelessly, I figured it was probably some rich, old woman who called to say that someone stole their diamond necklace when their dog (rat-dogs as I prefer to call them, have you seen Pomeranians) took it.
    “Hello,” I said twirling my lucky pen in my fingers.
    “Hi, my name is Sylvia Rogers,” said the woman on the phone, or Sylvia.
    “You’ve reached Sue’s Mysteries, what can we do for you? I’m Sue and I’d be happy to help you! I’m owner of this company and I’ll be happy to solve your mystery!” I said trying to sound polite, when actually I didn’t really care. I mean another case about a diamond necklace and I’ll scream!
    “Um, I live on Summit Drive, number 5. Um, I um, my pet, has been, um…” she trailed off.
    “Kidnapped?” I asked.
    “Yes! Yes, kidnapped. Um, I need you to find him for me,” she said. She didn’t sound too bright. Maybe a bit of an airhead.
    “That’s fine,” I replied, “but we’ll need an appointment, is tomorrow at 4 good?”
    “That’s fine…4 AM or 4 PM?” she asked.
    “4 PM,” I replied. She hung up very suddenly. I slammed down the phone, with enthusiasm that I didn’t feel. So who I should I send on this mystery? There was always Darren. But wait, no can do. He has another one. There was Tim…no he has something to do. There was always that new girl, Violet…but she seems a little inexperienced. Fine! I’ll go on this case myself. I haven’t had a case in sometime anyway. I’ll take Nick as a partner. Smart guy, Nick, just a little oblivious when he’s on his own. Last time I sent him on a mystery, his wife, Sarah, was being kidnapped, and he didn’t even notice, until he received a ransom note for her. He was in trouble for weeks after that. Ah, well, he’s one of my best friends. The phone rang and I picked it up, it was my best friend Jane, who worked at the New York Times. She was a famous hard-hitting reporter. The call after that was my husband, Toby, who was on a business trip at the moment. We chatted for a while and then I hung up. After that, was a sequence of unimportant events that led to me going home and going to bed.
    The next day, I found myself in Nick’s car (a gas guzzling thing, I might add) driving to Summit Drive. As we pulled on to Summit Drive, I saw a row of giant houses that had extremely neat lawns. It was like the Land of the Neat Lawns. It was sort of creepy seeing all that neatness, considering my apartment was messier than ever. I shared my thoughts with Nick. He chuckled.
    “You always did give everything weird names,” he replied smiling. I smiled too.
    “Oh, come on! Not everything!” I protested. He gave me a look that said ’yeah right!’
    “Almost everything,” he said, grinning.
    “That’s all I wanted,” I said. He started laughing.
    “Don’t laugh!” I nagged, “You’re going to hit something!” This only made him laugh harder.
    “Yes, Mom,” he said, when he was done laughing though he was still grinning like an idiot.
    “You’re getting more childish every day,” I said smiling.
    “Hey, I didn’t have a choice on whether to grow up or not, but I did have the choice to become mature or not!” he exclaimed, grinning.
    “And you couldn’t pick maturity?” I asked.
    “Where’s the fun in that?” he asked. As he said this, we pulled into number 5’s driveway. It was a giant house, with, of course, a neat lawn. There was a giant tree too, with red and orange leaves symbolizing fall. Ah, October. I jogged up the steps of my client’s massive, colossal house with Nick close behind.
    “Rich,” observed Nick. I let out a short laugh and rolled my eyes.
    “Everyone here is rich,” I said.
    “You mean on this street or on this property?” he asked. I thought for a moment.
    “Both,” I said. It was true, Nick and I were overflowing with money, and so was this woman, Sylvia. You wouldn’t believe how many people need detectives. We neared the door and I slowed down. I walked calmly up to door and rang the doorbell with certain coolness, while Nick stood next to me and was acting like a little boy who was going to the toy store. The door opened and there stood a flustered maid.
    “You must be the detectives,” she said. She led us into a room that was filled with all sort of knick-knacks like swords to a little elephant figurine. A woman was sitting next to the fire watching the television that was placed next to the fireplace. The woman was well, probably around my age, 27. Maybe a little older. She was imperial, and you could tell just by looking at here that she wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed, if you know what I mean. And oddly enough, she looked sort of like a turtle. She stood up as we came in.
    “You must be Sue?” she asked. How did she know?
    “Yeah, how did you know?” I asked.
    “Well, your company could send no less to me,” she said. How modest. I whispered so to Nick. He was unable to hide the smile.
    “As you know, I’m Sue, and this is my partner Nick,” I said. She waved her hand airily.
    “Yes, yes. Now about my pet. He is missing and I need to find him! I will give you 10,000 is you find him,” said Sylvia. Nick and I smiled.
    “Of course, now we will need money every day,” I said.
    “Of course, how much do you want?” she said.
    “Say 1 million,” Nick whispered to me. I ignored him.
    “50 would be good,” I said. A disappointed sigh came from Nick.
    “Of course. 50,000 it is,” she said. A slight cheer came from Nick. I didn’t bother correcting her that I meant $50, not $50,000.
    “So what is the pet’s name and what type of animal is he?” I said whipping out my notepad. Not that I needed it, of course.
    “I bet you 5 cents that it’s an alligator,” Nick whispered to me.
    “You’re on,” I whispered back, smiling.
    “It’s a turtle, his name Sir Edward the 5th,” said Sylvia.
    “The 5th?” Nick whispered, “I wondered what happened to the other 4.” I smiled and wrote down what she said.
    “When did you last see him?” I asked.
    “2 days ago, he was in his glass box,” she said.
    “When did you notice he was missing?” I asked.
    “Yesterday morning,” she said.
    “Okay, that’s all the information that I need, thank you,” I said pocketing my notepad. Nick and I left trying to seem as mysterious and as smart as everyone think we’ll be. We got into his car and starting driving back to headquarters.
    “You know, you owe me 5 cents,” I said.
    “I don’t have 5 cents on me right now,” he grumbled. Now he was acting like a little boy who got his toy taken away.
    “It’s okay,” I said, “I’ll take twenty.”
    “Twenty cents?” he asked looking at me quizzically.
    “Dollars,” I replied.
    “I’m not giving you-”
    “Truck!” I yelled cutting him off. He probably would have exploded into an array of colorful curse words, but luckily, the truck saved me from that. He swerved to avoid the truck.
    “That was close,” he exclaimed, panting.
    “You never were a good driver,” I said.
    “Neither were you!” he exclaimed.
    “That’s why I’m not driving right now,” I replied.
    “You know, you’ve changed a lot since we met,” he said.
    “That was 16 years ago,” I replied.
    “You know, what, you didn’t change that much,” he said.
    “Oh really,” I replied, hoping for a compliment.
    “Yeah, you nagged back then too,” he replied.
    “Oh, come on!” I exclaimed pushing him in the shoulder, laughing. He started laughing. After a few minutes of laughter, we finally calmed down a bit. I turned the radio on, carelessly.
    “Don’t turn on the radio!” exclaimed Nick, suddenly, shocking me.
    “Why?” I asked.
    “The government is trying to control our minds. They’re sending out mind-controlling messages over the radio!” he said earnestly.
    “I should have known,” I laughed.
    “No but seriously, turn off the radio,” he said.
    “Why?” I asked.
    “Because if my favorite song comes on, I’ll be too busy listening, singing along, and dancing to drive,” he replied sincerely.
    “You’re favorite song is 20 years old,” I said, laughing, “It won’t come on.”
    “Are you sure about that?” he asked.
    “Yes, I am sure,” I replied. The song on the radio ended, and the DJ’s voice came on.
    “And now it’s time for the oldies, song way back from the early 2000’s,” he said. Then, amazingly, Nick’s favorite song came on. I turned off the radio.
    “See?” he said.
    “Okay, so maybe it did come on,” I said. A short awkward silence followed.
    “So, what are you going to do for this lady Sylvia?” Nick asked.
    “Oh, you mean Turtle Girl?” I asked.
    “Turtle girl?” he asked.
    “Well, she has a turtle, and she looks like a turtle,” I replied, indignantly.
    “And you said that you don’t come up with names for everyone,” he said, chuckling.
    “I only come up with names for our clients, and where they live,” I replied.
    “Turtle Girl! You know what? You’re right, she does look like a turtle,” he exclaimed.
    “Yeah, I know!” I exclaimed. We reached the building and the rest of my day was spent picking up the phone and assigning cases to people.
    The next day I woke up early and took a cab to Nick’s house. I walked up the front porch avoiding all the toys left out on the porch, left out by Nick’s 2-year-old son, James. I rang the doorbell twice. I sipped my hot coffee, like any respecting detective, and leaned back on the railing. Nick opened the door.
    “Whoa, Nick! You look horrible!” I exclaimed. His hair was a mess, he was still in his robe, and he didn’t shave; he wasn’t a morning person.
    “Hold on,” he said, closing the door in my face. A few minutes later (around 10 minutes), he opened the door again as a normal person. How, in that time, he managed to brush his teeth, shave, and wake himself up, I’ll never know.
    “Dear, I’m leaving now,” he called to his wife. Dead silence.
    “Love you!” he called miserably. He closed the door behind himself. I gave him a frustrated look.
    “What did you do now?” I asked.
    “Forgot her birthday,” he mumbled. I shook my head.
    “Again?” I asked. He nodded. I got into the passenger seat of the car and he got into the driver’s seat.
    “Where are we going?” he asked.
    “Back to my office,” I replied.
    “Why?” he asked, looking at me, confused.
    “Why do you think? I got some info on this lady Sylvia, and I want to go over it,” I replied. He started driving. In a few minutes, we found ourselves in my office.
    “So why do you want to find info on this Turtle Girl?” Nick asked, smiling as he said Turtle Girl.
    “Oh, Nick! You silly, little boy! Always research the person so if they’re really murderers, you’d know,” I replied, as I dug through my papers looking for Turtle Girl’s files. I found it and with an exclamation of victory, I presented it to Nick. He took it, looked at it, and smiled.
    “This was from the Soup General,” he said handing it back. The Soup General was a case we had. A real puzzler, 40 missing cans of tomato soup. I glanced at it and realized I picked up the wrong file. I picked up the one next to it and gave it to him.
    “All right, Turtle Girl, what can we find out about you?” Nick mumbled sitting down in front of my desk. I plopped down on my chair and stretched back.
    “If I am doing all the work what are you doing?” Nick asked glaring.
    “Resting? Please do it? You’re so good at it!” I pleaded. He glared then his shoulders sagged.
    “Fine,” he said through gritted teeth. I smiled at him.
    “Thank you,” I said sweetly. A few minutes later, he frowned and beckoned me to come.
    “Look at this,” he said pointing to a paragraph. I read it quickly. Something about Sylvia’s husband dying 2 years ago from mysterious conditions. Of course, when I read that my imagination went off in crazy directions. My first thought was, she killed him. Then I cleared my head. Be rational I said to myself.
    “That’s interesting,” I said, frowning. This was strange of course. She could always possibly be a psycho bent on killing me. So what happened with her husband? That was the question. Maybe not the question I was being paid to answer but the question I intended to find the answer to.
    “We shouldn’t jump to conclusions,” Nick said. I nodded, we shouldn’t but it was hard not to. Ex-tremely hard not to.
    “What do you think happened?” I asked. Nick shrugged. We stared at the papers for awhile quiet as our thoughts raced in our heads. The silence was interrupted as the phone rang. I jumped back and bit back a scream. Calming myself quickly I answered it. It was Jane.
    “Hey Jane,” I said.
    “Hey, Sue! Are you doing anything important at 12?” she asked. I quickly checked my schedule.
    “No, not really,” I replied, “Nothing that couldn’t be put off.”
    “So you want to join me for dinner?” she asked. I sent a quick glance at Nick who was still reading the file intently. Or well he was acting like it. I could tell he was actually following the conversation with rapt conversation.
    “Can I invite a friend?” I asked.
    “A friend or a boyfriend?” asked Jane slyly.
    “Jane, I’m married,” I said frowning.
    “Okay, okay! Yeah you can invite,” she said. I hung up and turned to Nick.
    “You want to come to lunch with me?” I asked. Nick unsuccessfully tried to raise an eyebrow. He gave up trying after a few seconds.
    “Are you asking me out?” he said smiling. I glared at him.
    “You idiot! We’re married! To different people!” I exclaimed. He laughed at my obvious displeasure.
    “Yeah, sure, who else?” he asked.
    “Jane,” I replied. He nodded. He soon left to make a call to his wife explaining why he wasn’t going to be home for lunch.
    Soon lunch came and Nick and I headed off to an Italian restaurant. We found Jane waiting for us. She smiled at Nick and raised an eyebrow at me. Unlike Nick, she can actually raise an eyebrow. We sat down. Lunch went along quickly. When we finished the main course, Jane stood up to go to the bathroom. I followed her. We walked into the bathroom and she grinned at me.
    “You and Nick make such a cute couple!” she exclaimed. I was caught between being furious at her, or bursting into laughter.
    “I’m married,” I told her slowly. She brushed me off.
    “I know! But you and Toby make a cute couple. Actually you know what? You’re right. You and Toby are like MADE for each other! You’re wedding was SO cute!” she exclaimed. I chuckled and shook my head. Jane was always like this.
    “I know,” I said smiling.
    “So, when is he coming back from his business thing?” asked Jane as she checked her hair in the mir-ror. I grinned.
    “3 days from now,” I said, unable to keep the happiness out of my voice. He’s been gone for some time. Jane turned to grin at me.
    “Ohmigod! You’re glowing!” she said laughing slightly. Then she pouted.
    “Why are you pouting?’I asked.
    “You are so cute with Toby; Nick is so cute with his wife! When am I going to get a guy?” she asked looking sad. I smiled.
    “Don’t worry about it, he’ll come along! Now let’s go, Nick will be waiting for us,” I said taking her hand and slightly pulling her towards the door. We came to find Nick sitting at the table.
    “I paid,” he said when we arrived.
    “Oh! You shouldn’t have!” gasped Jane.
    “Yeah, what if we wanted dessert?” I asked. Nick turned red.
    “Did you?” he asked, clearly embarrassed. Jane and I laughed.
    “No, Nick, it is fine,” I said. Laughing, Jane and I said our goodbyes and I left with Nick.