Sunday, January 21, 2007
Bullshit
I don't do mornings well. I have a two to three hour period of ******** time following my initial rise. During this time I cannot be held accountable for my actions nor be expected to remember them. I have the right to remain silent and you have the obligation to shut the ******** up. I am liable to communicate with primitive grunts and hand motions. You are expected to understand the first time. If you're not happy I will be twice as irate than usual. Pregnant women, children and small animals should be kept at a distance of 100 meters as I may cause health risks including stillbirth, death, violent motion sickness and unexpected curb stompings.
If I'm glaring at you, you may need to fix your face as I find it distasteful for one reason or another. If you do not have access to a one-hour cosmetic surgeons clinic, a paper bag will do unless I have something against paper bags that morning.
Methods of crisis containment are as follows: tits if you're female or a riot-control round to the forehead at 2 meters or less.
I won't be going to bed tonight.
It sure would be nice if I had something important to say. Maybe I need a hobby.
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Despotic
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Dante Gunn
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