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... Once again now, It's a friggin journal.
*IC* ¬_¬
To esplain my pathetic emo-ness from a couple of entries back.... the whole "i don't technically exsist' bit... If i didn't lock away bits of my memory, i wouldn't exsist. i don't know how i'd have done it, but i would've been dead. I remember the memories, but it's like they happened to someone else, and i just watched. because that's the only way i can keep alive.

I mean, you have to live fast. Even if you're immortal -- especially if you're immortal. A lot of people don't agree... they think life is meant to be savoured, eaten raw like an antelope brought down with a spear; or even worse, locked up in a box and kept on a shelf. WhatEVER. You end up trapping yourself with useless memories. Chewing on them discontentedly like a leftover scrap of the antelope that's been speared.

The past is best forgotten -- but it's hard. People think the longer you live, the more you forget. They're wrong. Time brings the past into such sharp focus you can cut yourself on it.

That's why you gotta keep going, keep moving, keep changing. How else do you leave the past where it belongs? How else do you prove to yourself that it's done with you (or vise versa?) People think I do it to avoid responsibility. Maybe I do, but what the ******** wrong with that? I was responsible once...and look where it got me.

And I know...it's all still going to catch up to me... no matter what i do.






User Comments: [8] [add]
Rei Taerenn
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 02:50am
I disagree and agree with you, Skyla.


I dissagree- I would love to go back and not be so completely and hopelessly emo. To actually realize that death isnt a nice thing and cutting yourself hurts in more way then one. It went by too fast- the monotony of island life wasnt that great, expecially when i know there were so many things to do other then sulk.


I agree- The past is best forgotten. I mean, who would want to think of a time where all you remeber was blood and salt water?


commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 03:02am
Yeah, but you can't go back. So why waste time wishing you could? It's definately bette to spend time making the future the best place for the person that your past made you to live in. (actually... you could go back in time. but messing with your past self is never, ever good.)

That applies the my likfe oddly well. Blood, sweat, water, and nanobots. yup.



Skyla-kun
Community Member
Rei Taerenn
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 03:04am
I cant go back, true.... But I can completely start over.


commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 03:16am
....You can? *gets a slightly bad feeling*



Skyla-kun
Community Member
Rei Taerenn
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 03:18am
Yep. I can. But I won't; not until the damned war is over.


commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 03:20am
i like the war. i think it's funny. No matter who wins, those damned sadist faeiries will always own the earth. Aliens can't kil them any more than i can.



Skyla-kun
Community Member
Rei Taerenn
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 03:23am
I like the war, too. It makes a nice hobby or sometihng. 3nodding


commentCommented on: Sat Dec 23, 2006 @ 03:24am
...war is your hobby?

i knew that you were awesome.



Skyla-kun
Community Member
User Comments: [8] [add]
 
 
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