For the past week or so, I've noticed that Jane (or Spork) was acting strange... It seemed like she didn't care about me anymore, didn't love me as much as she used to. Everyone said I was overreacting, worrying too much. I trusted them and believed them because I am one of the most paranoid and insecure guys out there and often expect things that aren't true.
But yesterday, Jane snapped at me. She yelled at me because I was annoying her. She has never yelled at me like that before and it scared me because I am hypersensitive to being yelled at by friends and people I love.
I got online this morning to catch her before school and apologize to her and make amends. I apologized, but she never did. I went on to ask her if she still loved me as much as she used to and she told me yes. I asked her if she was still going to keep her promise, that she made numerous times, to never hurt me. She told me she didn't know. She also told me she didn't know if she wanted to be with me, that she was confused. She left for school and I was freaked out the rest of the day until she came home abnormally late.
I told myself during the day that I was going to be normal and not even bring up our problems and thats what I did. As usual, I told her I loved her and she said she loves me too.
Then I started to talk about how I'm going to work on some of my bad habits that annoy her because I love her and I want to make her happy. I asked her if she still wanted to be with me and she said she did.
Honestly minutes after that, we went in further conversation about our relationship. Long story short, she doesn't want to be with me. She thinks she's too young to date even though before she wanted to always be with me. She says she's too busy for a relationship right now. She told me she still loves me but, in her words, it isn't the "Lets be together forever!" love.
She told me she wants to take a break until she doesn't think she is busy anymore and that she might get back together with me afterwards. I doubt that she will want to.
My heart has been shattered for the second time and I feel like I can trust no one anymore. she promised she would never hurt me like Jennifer did, but she has almost exactly duplicated what Jennifer did to me.
I can't blame her. She's a child and I'm me. I'm not the greatest person and I guess I'm an even worse boyfriend.
But that's it for this journal update.
Jane has told me that I can date other people... But I doubt I can. We'll see.
Jane, if you read this, I still love you and I know you're well aware of that. I hope that you really will take me back when you think you're no longer busy. You know that there isn't anyone in the world that I rather be with than you... And I hope that you will feel the same way about me once more.
But yesterday, Jane snapped at me. She yelled at me because I was annoying her. She has never yelled at me like that before and it scared me because I am hypersensitive to being yelled at by friends and people I love.
I got online this morning to catch her before school and apologize to her and make amends. I apologized, but she never did. I went on to ask her if she still loved me as much as she used to and she told me yes. I asked her if she was still going to keep her promise, that she made numerous times, to never hurt me. She told me she didn't know. She also told me she didn't know if she wanted to be with me, that she was confused. She left for school and I was freaked out the rest of the day until she came home abnormally late.
I told myself during the day that I was going to be normal and not even bring up our problems and thats what I did. As usual, I told her I loved her and she said she loves me too.
Then I started to talk about how I'm going to work on some of my bad habits that annoy her because I love her and I want to make her happy. I asked her if she still wanted to be with me and she said she did.
Honestly minutes after that, we went in further conversation about our relationship. Long story short, she doesn't want to be with me. She thinks she's too young to date even though before she wanted to always be with me. She says she's too busy for a relationship right now. She told me she still loves me but, in her words, it isn't the "Lets be together forever!" love.
She told me she wants to take a break until she doesn't think she is busy anymore and that she might get back together with me afterwards. I doubt that she will want to.
My heart has been shattered for the second time and I feel like I can trust no one anymore. she promised she would never hurt me like Jennifer did, but she has almost exactly duplicated what Jennifer did to me.
I can't blame her. She's a child and I'm me. I'm not the greatest person and I guess I'm an even worse boyfriend.
But that's it for this journal update.
Jane has told me that I can date other people... But I doubt I can. We'll see.
Jane, if you read this, I still love you and I know you're well aware of that. I hope that you really will take me back when you think you're no longer busy. You know that there isn't anyone in the world that I rather be with than you... And I hope that you will feel the same way about me once more.
![[Cynic]](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/4c/a9/f77122e20a94c.png?t=1221199997_6.00_00 "[Cynic]")
Community Member
Just give it time... It all might work out. Just try and stay friends with her and you never know... She might see that you are a good one to date / have a relation ship with... Good luck man!