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Collected Ramblings
A Glimpse Into The Daily Runnings Of Your Typical Teenager.
Things Are Okay.
It Seems The Most Likely Choice On Our Next Move-List Is To Saint Joseph, Missouri.
That's Pretty Neat, Too, Because I Can Move A Bit Closer To A Special Someone.
We're Still A Handful Of Hours Apart, But It's Still Important.

Recently, My Entire Computer Got Wiped.
It's A Blank Box Now.
Basically, We Went From Changing Part, To Changing A Lot Of Them.
After Changing All The Parts And Such, I've Lost All My Computer's Memory.
That Means My Collection Of Underground/Japanese Music? Gone.
It's Going To Be A Total Pain To Get Back.

I Might Not Be Playing Anymore World of Warcraft.
I'm At Least Going To Be Giving Another Game A Good Try, Before I Bail On It.
I Still Don't Have Anything More Than A Outline Sketch Of The Person I'll Be There.
An Oddball, Like On All The Other Online Games I've Dabbled In, I'd Bet.

So, Speaking Of Characters, I Made This Odd, Scholarly Guy On A Game Called Arcanum. He Looked Like I Imagined The Book-Character, Heinrich Faust, To Look Like.
So, I Made Him All Faust Was; Man Who Sold His Soul, A Doctor, An Alchemist, And A Necromancer.
All The Classical Depictions Of Faust Rolled Into One Character.
Unfortunately, With A Blank Computer, he Doesn't Exist Anymore...
I Thought About Remaking Him, But It'd Be Boring.

My Cousin Eric Just Flew Back To Houston Recently.
It's Really Depressing. It's So Dull Without Him Here.
I'm Wasting My last Few Weeks Of Summer Watching Stand-Up Comedy,
And Sitting Online, While Trying To Download All The Stuff I Used To Have.
I Wish He Were Still Here, Kind Of.
He Was A Royal Pain In The Neck, But He Was Worth It.

I've Just Recently Finished My Tenth Chapter In A Story I've Been Writing.
It's An Okay Fanfiction.
According To One Of My Fans, I Should Try To Keep It Going.
It'll Be Difficult, As My Time To Write It Dwindles Away.
But, I Was Thinking About Keeping It Going Up To A Good Fifteen Chapters, Or So.
I Don't Know, There's Just So Much Drama I Could Add To It, And It'd Make Things Better, And Insure Its Not Such A Dry Read.

Anyways, I'm Bored.
And Pretty Happy.

I've Added Some Weird People Into My Interests List.
d**k, From Big Brother 8 And Jimmy Wang Yang.
I Don't Know Why I Like Them, But I Do.
One's A Totally Pushy In-Your-Face Atheist,
And The Other's A Delightfully Happy-Go-Lucky Asian Cowboy.
I Like Oddballs.

From Here, I'm Actually Continuing From A Couple Days Later.

I've Actually Spent A Lot Of Time Thinking.
I Do That, A Lot.
Not About Important Things, I Guess Its More Like "Worrying" Rather Than Thinking.
I Meticulously Plan Out Things That Don't Matter, Like What I'll Do In The Afternoon, Before I Check My Email Tomorrow And How To Respond To People's Imaginary Questions.

I'm Listening To "Somewhat Damaged".
I Feel A Little Like That, Now That I've Seen Myself.
I'm Tired Of Disappointing Myself In My Efforts, And Those Around Me.
I'm Tired Of Coming Short.

I'm Also Tired Of Pressure.
I Told My Parents I'd Like To Take An Extra Year To Wait Before Getting My Driver's Permit.
Lo And Behold, My Dad Just Bought Me A Pawned-Off-For-100-Dollars Car.
It's Very Low-Grade, And It Was Cheap,
But I'm Not Ready For It, So It Irked Me That He Didn't Listen To What I Had To Say

Also, For My Birthday, My Dad's Gotten Me A Mosin-Nagant Rifle.
A Russian War-Grade Gun, Complete With Ammunition In Classic Paper Cases.
I'm Proud, Yet Guilty To Own It.
I'm Guilty Because I Told A Friend I Wouldn't Buy A Gun.
It's Not Like I'm Going To Use It, Honestly.
I Don't Hunt, Or Eat Meat.
I Can't Use It For Protection, Because It's In A Safe.
And Technically, I Didn't Know Someone Got It For Me, And Even Still, It's A Gift.
But, Who Am I Trying To Convince, You Or Myself?
My Dad Makes Me Go To The Gun-Range Sometimes, And I Usually Just Watch Him Shoot At Targets, Bored, But I Guess This Time, I'll Be Shooting, Too.
Forgive Me, Friend, If You Ever Stumble Onto This.

I've Been Rereading Everything I Can Possibly Find On A Game.
I'm Planning A Character With Everything In Mind;
So, I'm Not Really Planning, I'm Worrying.
I Don't Even Know If I'll Get The Game, Or If I'll Stick With It.
All I Know Is I'll At Least Try It, Somehow.

"Everything You Swore Would Never Change Is Different Now,
Just Like You Said You And Me Would Make It Through.
We Didn't Quite.
Fell Apart.
Where The F*ck Were You?
"

-Somewhat Damaged

That Line Really Just Grabs A Fistful Of My Heart And Twists.
I'm Still Guilty That I Missed A Close Friend's Birthday.
I Doubt They Even Know How Guilty I Feel, But I Still Am.
That "Now Where The F*ck Are You?" Just Wrenches My Emotions.
It Makes Me Think Of Myself, Where Was I?
I Was Probably Doing The Same Thing As I Am Now, And Feeling Sorry For Myself.
I Haven't Stopped Listening To 'Somewhat Damaged' For A Couple Hours Now.
I Can't.
It's Like Playing With Fire; I Know It's Tearing Me Up Over Things, But I Can't Stop.

I Ran My Thumb Through A Vegetable Grinder Today.
It Hurts Like Sin.
I Was Trying To Slice Some Carrots Really Thin, So They'd Stir-Fry Well,
And While Trying To Hold The Carrot Still, I Ran Through It.
It's Pretty Deep Too; Took A Little Of My Nail Polish Off.

My Nail Polish Looks Terrible.
So Does My Hair.
My Nails Are All Chipping Polish, And Short,
And My Hair's All Knotted, Because I Had To Cut My Shower Today Short Because I Had To Watch The Dogs For A Good Three Hours Or So.
I Could Kennel Them, But I'd Feel Guilty To Do So.
I Can't Stand Doing Things Like That.

We're Getting Fish, For Our Fish-Tank.
Last Time We Had One, I Didn't Get To Name Any Fish.
My Sister, And My Parents Named Them All,
Basically, My Sister Threw Something Out, And They Agreed.
This Time, I'm At Least Naming Two.
Boddah, And Moxie, After Kurt Cobain's Imaginary Friend, And An Old Soft Drink.
I Don't Know Why, But I Feel Kind Of Redeemed.
I Was A Little Bitter About Them Only Letting Me Name A Slug, Which Died Soon After.

I'm Tired Of Myself.
I'm Depressed And Ashamed Of It Because I Have No Reason To,
Living A Gifted Life, With People Who Love Me.
Just Another Reason To Be Disappoint In Myself.

I'm Actually Very Bored.
So Bored That I Cleaned The Entire House While Playing A Looping Clip Of Pyramid Head Dancing.
I Also Donated Half My New-Outfit Funding To Someone.
I Suppose I Needed The Good Karma.
My Sister Caught Wind Of That, And Tried To Pay Me...
It's Not Karma If Someone You're Related To Tells You The Reason
Why Their Doing Something Nice Is Karma.

My Uncle, Donnie, Died A Couple Days Ago.
I Never Really Got To Know Him, But It's Like 'For Whom The Bell Tolls'.
No One Person Is An Island, He Took A Little Bit Of Everyone With Him.
Apparently, His Heart Was Out Of Wack From Years Of Drugs, Heroin I Believe.
He Had A Heartattack. They Found Him. They Called.
They're Moving Him From Maryland Back To Oklahoma Where He Was Born.






User Comments: [1] [add]
Blooooregaurd
Community Member
avatar
commentCommented on: Mon Aug 20, 2007 @ 10:23pm
Well I'd Enjoy Missouri.
We Could See Tori And Eric WAY More.
Plus Mom Said She'd Support Me In The Actress Business.

And About The Comment You Left Me.
That's So True.
Why Can't They? Lawls.


User Comments: [1] [add]
 
 
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