Someone Out There

• Artist: sweet_sparkle616
• Description: I first wrote this as a journal entry but decided to put it here.
  I have not copied anyone and if someone has something like this then please let me know.
  I wrote this thinking about poverty and how there is little change.
  Advice is welcome as well as feedback =]
• Date: 01/02/2010
• Tags: someone food poverty nightmares hobo

I'm here sitting on a chair,eating some pizza and listening to music,
Someone out there is sitting in a box, eating nothing and shivering as the rain falls.

I'm here sleeping peacefully in my bed having wonderland dreams and waking up to a good tomorrow,
Someone out there is sleeping on the corner of the street having dreadfull nightmares and not knowing if they will even survive for a tomorrow.

I'm here watching tv, while people are watching the poor hobo, and listening to him plea.

I'm here complaining about dinner, how I wanted kraft dinner and got some brocoli,
Someone out there is begging for some food, not caring what they get or how much.

I'm here writing on my computer not knowing how to stop all poverty in the world,
Someone out there is waiting for me, waiting for me to help make a change.

Comments

[sweet_sparkle616]

would you mind if i used this : I'm here sleeping peacefully in my bed, wonderland dreams [drifting] in my head/ Waking to an untroubled morning, free of any urgent warning.

[sweet_sparkle616]

thanks for the advice, i never noticed i had made that mistake n.n

[ShadySally]

@#$%! Sorry 'bout that last comment. I JUST realized I never used 'having' or 'with' in my example. *facepalm*

[ShadySally]

A valid poem about poverty. I like that you avoided being too cheesy with it. A type-o, 'I'm here sleeping peacefully in my bed have good dreams...' You could switch 'have' with 'having' or 'with'. Example: "I'm here sleeping peacefully in my bed, wonderland dreams [drifting] in my head/ Waking to an untroubled morning, free of any urgent warning. /But someone out there..." I dunno. Hope that was the kind of advice you were looking for.

[i-bleeding-black-roses-i]

cool ^ ^