• It is so hard to choose
    Between the phaser and the wine
    Kill myself slowly and feel the pain
    Or end it in one giant burst
    I cannnot end up like him
    A drunken son of a *****
    So I think I will do it
    In the shortest time possible
    Even if he won't be home
    For hours and hours
    My life has been short
    But nothing I regret
    It was long enough
    To experience many things
    I might not have known
    My friends, my journey
    All of what made me
    What I am today
    From my liberty from the Borg
    To my numerous lessons
    In individuality and
    Even a relationship or two
    But now it is all
    Going to be wiped
    From my life
    Like a computer reset
    Except that this
    Will be a permanent solution
    I know that everyone
    Especially my dear Captain
    Will be devastated
    But I can't take
    The pain anymore
    I set the phaser
    Next to my temple
    My hand brushes
    My face and I
    Feel the cool metal of
    My optical implant
    The one distinguishing mark
    That shows I am like no other
    As my tears fall
    Down my cheeks
    I count under my breath
    My voice hitches at the last number
    Maybe a moment
    Of weakness or hesitation
    It did not matter
    For I started again
    My wills steeled
    As one last tear falls
    One, two, three
    I press the button
    And I fall limp to the floor
    All that there is left of me
    Besides my cold, empty shell
    Is a note that I penned
    With a quaking hand
    That says "I'm sorry..."
    "...But resistance was futile."