• Why is it I pain so much and gain so little. Is it god trying to belittle me? My heart is growing cold as I grow bold, but my life hasn’t even started yet. But ill put my life at risk with this bet, that Ill continue on through all the sorrow. As long as I can see the light of tomorrow. Then not all hope is lost. Even though with all the pain I feel lost. I have to work to the top until they call me boss. Eyes full of tears even though ive been pushing through all these years. Feel like a deer in the head lights. Stiff and cant move. Frightened but then again enlightened. But cant die here so I gotta move. Push through everything like a bulldozer. Be on top and still feel like a loser. My mind going crazy feel like its about to explode, but instead it implodes and I collapse. I keep running in circles already done 100 laps. Whats wrong with me, I don’t know? Lay in the snow until my body turns numb cant move my limbs no more, I wonder why. Feel a cold tear run down my face, am I crying? Or am I just dying. Life makes u experience so many things its pretty funny. But im talking about this like its past tense, but Its still happening so its still the present tense, and im real tense cuz life is crazy.