Illusion

• Artist: XxXBrennaxBearXxX
• Description: short poem i came up with in a couple of minutes
• Date: 09/30/2009
• Tags: illusion

Life is but an illusion
It makes you feel
It makes you beleve
To pass the time by

As soon as it starts it ends
in the blink of an eye
It all ends

Life is like a book
You have your ups and downs
But with it the end
The end is always
The end

Those who don't care
Have seen throu the
Illusion

But most people are happy
With their "life"
Unable to see the sad truth

That life is but an illusion
And that it has to end sometime!

Comments

[UC Poika]

I thought that thought but it was only an illusion too. Excellent I wish I could give you a 5 but the voting is closed--btw how did you do that!
Also by the way, I am giving 100g to those who read, rate and comment on my stuff in the arena. Check it out.

[2pound]

doesn't have to rhyme: it does need rhythm. (google/define: them). also, you're just stating things, not showing us; example: life.... makes you feel.... How? makes you beleve... How? blink of an eye is a cliche; how is life like a book? needs more explanation/elaboration. stating obvious things (the end is the end.... what else could it be? you're the writer, use YOUR imagination) PM me for more con. crit.

[Gjornia X]

I say explore this more, rewrite it and repost it as an "updated" or "revied" version. you're going somewhere with this, i just wish the journey was a bit longer...

[xXNieLXx]

this is the most valued writing ive read.

[alfonsos-angel]

i like it great job

[wolf king sarutobi]

Sound true to me...but is the end realy the end...?