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Children's blithe laughter
Paper ripped from the boxes
Revealing the gifts
- by II so long farewell II |
- Holiday Poem Contest
- | Submitted on 12/12/2008 |
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- Title: A Holiday Haiku
- Artist: II so long farewell II
- Description: I personally love haikus because they focus on one moment of time, lionizing it and helping the reader visualize it. So, I've decided to write on about children on christmas morning. ^^
- Date: 12/12/2008
- Tags: holiday haiku
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Comments (5 Comments)
- The Running Abby - 05/27/2009
- i loved that poem it was so catchy!!!
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- starburst10195 - 01/02/2009
- love that u made a hakoiu 9or how ever u spell it ) everyone else tries to make theres rhyme..5
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- Miss-Natty - 12/22/2008
- It's so cute. I love it. ^-^
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- songsilence - 12/21/2008
- Very, very good job. For some strange reason, I'm not liking the word "revealing" in there, but I don't know what to replace it with. Maybe it's just the fact that it clashes with "ripped." Maybe if you changed that to "torn" instead? Just an idea. It's still quite nice.
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- Kiyoura - 12/15/2008
- Short, simple moment. Everything is wrapped up in 3 lines. For describing holidays, I don't think a specific single moment of where gift-opening is enough. =
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