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  • Arenas
  • ♂♀Sacrifies♀♂
  • Title: ♂♀Sacrifies♀♂
  • Artist: Hikaru1214
  • Description: They wer brought to da Lord of all Shinigami,the Lord said," wat will u choose ur mission yet for da boy to die or this young boy's future and he will live long, but u need to sacrifices ur life in exchange?",she said," My,Lord, I'll SACRIFICES my long life for da man I love", then" Thank you for the good memories,it was great and I LOVE U", then da Lord say's" as u decided"then da girl turn into tiny lights,he hug her," I LOVE U too",before she disappear is a LOVING KISS.
  • Date: 06/24/2009
  • Tags: sacrifice
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Comments (3 Comments)
  • TheScare13 - 06/25/2009
  • Ignoring the bad vocab, it sounds like a lovely story, and i think you should proceed with making it if you haven't, I'm going to have to read it if you have...but I give it 5/5 ^_^
  • Porcelain Sweetheart - 06/24/2009
  • A lot of the anatomy is off, the spelling and grammar of the description is horrid, you could've made it look somewhat cleaner (maybe line it with a pen?) and some parts are very light (hard to see) Keep trying though, you have potential. 2/5
  • ravenswood99 - 06/24/2009
  • ummmmm,
    maybe the description would be clerer if you used better vocabulray, i couldn't realyl understand. sorry. =(
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