Again, I dreamt I was above an enormous pool full of fish, they were so beautiful and colorful, but I was somewhat scared, yet tremendously fascinated, by them.
From what I remember it was like some sort of study trip or something. Then the scene changed, I was sitting at a restaurant drinking something and this guy I met years ago at a chiva, (More about this guy in this entry.) comes up to me and hugs me, for some odd reason and we're there just hugging and this lady comes up to me and says I'm too young for him (apparently in my dream, he's 27 and I'm 19) so I tell the lady that since I didn't care about what she said, her statement was not valid.
And then I don't remember.
But this entry is not about the dream. It's about how that dream affected me today. For several months now, I haven't thought about falling in love, or even about love itself, I've been caught up in college, (where there are no hot guys I must add) caught up reading stories, roleplaying and I guess all of it has kept that little pain at bay. That dream reminded me of how lonely I really am, and how I wish I wan't. Truth be told there's a part of me that firmly thinks being in love is stupid because of all the drama that happens with love at my age, but then, there's that side that just wishes and wishes so hard to be in love and be loved back. Because heaven knows I've been in love many times, but it's never mutual, I'm the one who falls for the other person, and you can imagine how it ends up.
For the time being I'll just have to find something to forget about how I feel again.
heart