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We now return to Story Time of the Heroes, featuring everyone's favorite person of all time, Morgan Freeman! (jk)
Back to the story:

I was forced to use my second best weapon to end the quarrel with Dastardly Dan, my Citrus Bazooka. (Yes, it's a bazooka that shoots lemons and oranges and tangeloes and such.) One shot with this amazing feat of machinery and Dastardly Dan went flying over the horizen, all the way to the nearest maximum security prison, where the wardens were both shocked and relieved to have this evil,evil man off the streets. I hurried home to retrieve the Froot Loops for the poor British orphans. But when I got there, I was in for a surprise...

(Yes, there's a cliff-hanger for every part of this story, get over it.)