Me and Myra (or the other way around o.O... I've never known when to use which, though a lil better now that before.... ya'll know what I mean)
How those two names came to be two different characters still we are always one and the same in all situations, how did that happen? How did Myra come to be? Did she exist before she became 'myra'? or did she just appear because a character was needed?
I mostly know the answer to that one, though I have thought about it today, where her roots are.
I belive she always was here, with me, in my mind.
I think about alot of things, pointless things, things I could have said, should have said, and situations that could have been. A voice, if you could hear that voice now, you'd not recognize it, it has never changed.
Many of you describe it in drawings and words as some creature on yar shoulder, wispering to you, you often reply, though not always express it outloud.
When I listen to that voice, I can hardly help but grin at its words. The voice never had a name, but I gave it a name. I even gave it shape, though I have limited its behaviour, its image...
That voice is me, I can truelly say that, but still, it aint anything like the person I seem, what I do and say has rarely anything to doo with it.
Lately, with short outbreaks of words and anger, often confusion, I have wondered why. I know what it was about, but why did it happen?
suddenly I feel like Im saying tipical, something everyone has heard in a movie or read in a book, oh how dramatic and emotional that thing can be gonk xp not really... thinking about that makes me wonder if I should carry on descusing this matter...
I will continue, even if Im starting to have doubt about meaning in all of this... there is some meaning, but what I was meaning at the beginning..
nevermind...
I was talking about a voice, yes? a voice what if it had a body and was known, it could not be compared to yourself.
When I let that voice keep its form, I often take a liking of beliving I could do such things, say them, but in reality, I'd never really dare. Ya cant kill someone without getting in trouble (though there are often people that dont get caught), its not like the next day you could drag the body out and no one would really mind (asking a question 'why is it there', and ya say 'it just is' and theyd just say 'ok, have a nice day then ^^' eek )
Until now, I gave this voice a form and like I said, with a limited mind of its own. I never really thought about how that thought came up, though I always knew that it wasnt just because I needed a character.
I have often said I wanted a split personality ^^ someone to talk to and I'd not care what others thought of it really, like it was a normal thing (I admit I'd like the wandering eyes staring at me, 'who ya talking to?' 'too a 10ft dragon with dreadfully sharp teeth' 'oh, really...' 'yes, and sometimes it comes to life and eats people!' '... oh.. yeah... ok sweatdrop ' .... though I cant see any of that happening any time in this reality (yes... I admit its strange... o.O.. but Im always told Im strange, so really, its not really strange whee )
....
point lost, come again later...
alright... VOICE.. that is loosing meaning o.O... darn it all.. [growls] darn those digressions.... I had a point.. I know it...
o.O.. or something ^^
oh yeah...
and that voice has never been heard from again ninja [laughs] freaking hilarious ^^ aint it?
Y know that voice isnt all that smily and happy?
its more like angery and sarcastic, grinning and mean...
and I love it...
though I seem to have kept it on a short leash (ya cant describe Myra as all angery, sarcastic, grinning and mean? can ya? she has the touch of most all of those things, but I can tell ya... she aint all that nice... not really... its like... 'ok, dont go to far' and 'he aint worth it' or something along those lines... ya know why she aint a fighter still always begging to learn? its my fault... I cant see myself really doing any of those things, but I always wish I could... it seems to reflect harsly on her... sweatdrop
I can already hear her repeating what I said 'yeah, its your fault, I could have done more' and Im sure she will... not sure, I know...
but I wonder, even if I mention all of this, will I ever let the leash go? It has for a long time now been streached and gotten longer...
She has a stronger image now, of her true nature, but I never want to let her go, not fully, why? because Im not sure how to .... it doesnt matter, Im learning... she's learning....
She is me and Im her, though we are not the same...
I've heard everone has their lil demon within, would ya belive me that Myra's mine? if ya hadnt been reading all of this, and I'd just ask you, 'do ya think Myra's my inner demon?' ... I dont know and I doubt ya would...
..
because of that leash...
But in most things, she is herself, though I tend to push up at the smile and 'no hard feelings'....
The image she has already, she can be mean, but she tends to lighten up things, like there is nothing to it, no reason...
But Im considering letting the leash go (though its a slow progress that was going on before I saw it... I just truelly saw it today... I found Myra's spot.. ya can call it that....
but now.. now I cant really say that Im her and she's me, that we both are the same.... not really....
though I have said sometimes that Myra tends to shine though... and thats true... in the form of being mean, but mostly the anger is within (Im still working on letting it out, let it go... but I have never found a point in reality where such things can happen for me... so basicly, Myra has to deal with it, in a way... and it does not add to her good-side.... x.x)....
its almost strange to look at the description I just made of Myra...
I know why, because no one really knows... If ya remove the laughs and smiles, only leaving the grin and sarcastic chuckles/laughs... then ya basicly got myra's side of enjoyment (as laughin at that sad lil kid with the icecream on msn).... o.O...
I often wish I could let myra more out in real life, I know it would help me.. people say its bad to build up things, to keep them within.... but it keeps on doing so if nothing is done about it... and I could talk about it all I want here (or rather type about it) and nothing would happen in real life...
I need that... I need something to be done in reality... my reality... this isnt right...
but I guess Im as usually hyper and laughing to keep it under controle ^^ a touch cage around this mess, no one wonders, and no one worries when people seem normal and happy ^^ dont they always blaugh its almost sad to think about it... stressed why say that ya feel fine when ya are asking to be saved and listened to? say ya have noting to say...
I still do those things... maybe in hope people care enough to past those things, to know when I mean them and when I dont... but how could they, never really leaving a clue about it exept in these desperate looking posts, why do I need them? because people dont see though a smile, few do... (ok.. Im sorry, I almost got into an old descusion there... sorry... I've been told its noting.. it sure aint, Im still wondering about it stressed )
Suddenly, with some sarcastic view on it... that what Im about to say will sound just plain silly and tipical, strange and unexpected, that it doesnt have to happen because it already has....
but..
I'd think Myra is finally coming out... and Im pretty happy about it...
alright.. I can already hear things in my mind, what people would say, that sound like 'that aint true' 'you are so darn wrong, have ya listened to yar self?' o.O... if any of ya will say that... have a reason.. because Im feeling quite content and satisfied by the thing I just said in this whole thing... though it might not seem true...
I guess myra's an inner image.. so there for, a inner demon, that has never... really... whatever... I have made a point.. I hope I aint rumbling again (because just yesterday I dud such a thing, and it was only half right, the doubt I had, did not exist exept in words, not in mind... I wonder if thats true about this matter.... I cant say it is... but what if.... what if Im just wondering about things that arent really there... )
Sometimes I post these things that I truelly want people to read and comment on... but it does usually not happen, I dont belive enough people read my stuff, at the moment, I'd wish they would... but it has lil meaning.... or so...
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erotic, not exotic... fruits are exotic
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Damron Community Member 
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Dark stardragon
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Dark stardragon
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bite yo asses, bite yo asses [I wonder why I keep saying that, for real... its so catchy gonk ] thought it seems a relief from the 'w00t w00t' that is starting to annoy me... its so.. w00t w00tever....
with each comment comes a free cake (the less pointless, the more tasty... but... o.O.. whatever... just smile and ya get a cake anyways ^^ smile yar freaking faces off because so many people are watching ninja ya have to be aware of the people, I dont know them... not all of em.... they just... want free cake surprised