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My heart is still in pain..I mean I don't know why.. It really shouldn't but it is... What can I say I am lost... Its been over a year since the brake up but my heart still aches. I try to convince myself I don't love her or that I am done thinking about her but you know apart of me will still always think of her.. Will always love her I guess. I tried everything from moving to hanging out with my friends from god know what but I am still hurting.. Its driving me insane. I thought everything was alright was cool but today I am taking it hard cause today is one year since the break up...You know I just wish I knew how she was doing... At least to talk but according to her sister she doesn't even want to see me around... I don't get it at all... I don't know I guess this rant right here is about my heart... I am just tired of it getting broken... Getting ripped into two.. I want to find love again.. but everytime I try I get shot down... I really don't know what I am doing wrong... I mean I know I am not the greatest guy in town. But once I am in a relationship I give my all into it...Maybe thats my problem maybe thats what I am doing wrong is I put my heart into it all that it just hurts more when it ends... Thats me though. I care for the one I love so much that I try to do everything in my power to make them happy.. Its just bull s**t that I get s**t on all the time... I don't know maybe after today I will be fine since this is the year.. I just hope it is... I really do.. Because I don't know how long my heart can be on strings like a puppet till it finally turns into stone..


p.s Diss me if you will I just felt like I had to rant a bit... Just to write what I am feeling right now thats all... I wil lbe happy tomorrow just it hit again. and I needed to let off steam alittle.