God, I feel like s**t... I can't believe how stupid I was... I blame the heat, I havent been feeling right all day. Nearly threw up once, and then I just got pissed at Mom for her getting a little testy with me (runs in the family, now I think of it.)
I... shouted at everyone at Amanda's... I dunno, it was really friggin' weird... I just - couldnt stand to be around them. Nan teased me over my shirt, and I took it way the hell to seriously. Yelled at her directly...
That's what I feel worst about... I guess that I was so used to caring about what she thought that when she insulted me, I snapped... like she didnt care about my feelings. Although she doesnt really care about what I think in general... its good for her though... she shouldn't be held back by other people's oppinions. Unlike my stupid self.
Where am I going with this?
I've already appologised over the phone to people, and kinda freaked out over an IM... to no one on the other end. It felt good... hope the other person doesnt think I was being a self pitying nutcase like my father, though I think I may have come across that way.
*sigh* Well, I'm gonna try to forget about this... If I don't, I'm not gonna get any sleep tonight. One of these days I need to learn how to not think when I'm trying to get some sleep, it would be much easier if I could just stop long enough to catch some Z's.
 Sutiiven · Wed Jun 28, 2006 @ 05:03am · 0 Comments |
