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Life
I turn 21 in about 5 months, i swear i cant wait. setting here got the music up good and drinking Jager and im having a good time lol though i dunno why. There was a point where i used to want to get drunk all the time, i loved the feeling, hmm not so much the after effect but that feeling where you just dont care about things, random things pop up in my mind and i sing a lot. I was watching on the news early or something and it was talking about these people who made millions or something and i swear i felt sick. When i have my own life and my own family, i dont care if im rich or anything, i just want to be able to live comfortably without worrying about the bills every month. I want to have kids, i dunno about the whole house with the white picket fence but ugh im not picky. There is so much i want to do and so many place i want to go and so much i want to experience but yet sometimes it feels out of reach but i dont really care, im gonna try and make all these things possible regardless. I dont want to just survive in the world, i want what my parents and what my family wants and that is to make something of myself. I want to do better than they did in life. I'm not complaining but hmm if i had kids, i would want them to have a better life than i had. Every time i feel like im close to figuring out what i want to do in live, i stop and take a step back and overthink it but gah im so tired of over thinking things, i want to be impulsive a little. Why is the economy so dang bad? i swear i hate getting gas because its getting higher every time i see it. Oh, hmm i dont like some congress people, they do nothing and yet they get paid so much yet people are out there everyday working until they cant work anymore and they are only just barely making it but i guess that's life. Listening to hear you me and i love this song, i would want this played at my funeral. My parents say all the time they dont know what they would do if i was killed or died because they, being older, and me just becoming a adult, they say i havent experienced life and i suppose i havent but its amusing, people all the time think that these accidents or anything wont happen to them. I'm afraid to say but i actually agree with my parents when they say that young people act like they are invincible. you might not agree with me but its true, people do so much and dont even think of the consequences and it's really sad. You read the newspaper and see that someone had wrecked and that they didnt make it but yet you might think that it wont happen to you but it can and some people need to realize that. What is sad, it that when sometimes, something bad has to happen for people to finally wake up, to finally see, i dont want that to happen. there is a town near me, and ever where there was posters of this young woman who was missing, she was young, not even 30 or anything. in the picture of her, she was smiling, i dont remember the name, but you could tell that her family or friends or whoever put up the posters were desperate to find her because they were at every store and i mean at every one. Can you imagine that? the pain of not knowing where your daughter or sister or mother or friend is? It makes me want to cry. I dont know when the world got so bad, when you have to be cautious just to go to the store or something. I dunno, i'm just rambling but its on my mind and i dunno how to express it other than writing it because thinking is only thinking and nothing more.
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