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There is no hell worse than a personal one. One that a person can never escape and told to feel so ashamed about because of this. What I am talking about is when people, mainly teens are forced into hiding because of their sexuality.
I am a kid, well nearly an adult now who has faced this kinda problem. Knowing full well that world will hate me, because I happen to love another boy. Feeling the pain of having to hide all your feelings inside because you think they are wrong. The feeling of being ashamed of yourself and how much you hate yourself for having to hide all this inside. And even trying to force yourself straight by dating girls, that you don't even love. Just trying to accept that this is life and how it should be. Cold and lonely, dieing slowly inside every time you tell the same old lie.
That is a personal hell that so many people face each day and some it even kills. Why is that? I mean shouldn't people be allowed to be free in who they love, well that's not always the case. Sure we are, but here I found that kids are often made fun of, such as in my case, when we are treated like we did something wrong, like we have something to feel ashamed of. We are treated like we are some kinda mental freak because of this small detail about us. It's not right that we are treated like subhumans in school and even outside with things like the "Don't ask don't tell" policy, which to me is even more degrading than any bullying a school yard can produce.
This cruelty has been going for so long and is now embedded into our system as a taboo thing, that now we use homosexual terms as insults or as away to describe something repulsive, it's just as wrong and can never be justifiable no matter what people say. They maybe words, but their meanings have been bastardized to the point that they are just second nature nowadays to be assumed to be a bad things or something "stupid" in our ways now. But it's still a form a degrading towards people who are like me and like all the others who are homosexual. And really people should take the time to think these things through before this mindless vomiting of words.
My personal account on all this really is how much horrible crap I had to go through all because I happen to love another male. I get beaten up and insulted daily by the kids at my school. I often get things thrown at me, people push me around in the halls and yell at me from cars. All because of this small detail of me, that I feel so proud to share with people and I am not ashamed that the one I call my love is another male. Who's name is Mike, the greatest person to have ever come into my life, the one who picked me up when I was down. And even helped carry me through the darkest moments. I will never stop loving him and even though the world seems to hate us, it doesn't bother us, all we need is each other to carry on. Now really isn't that what love is all about? Isn't that what should matter, that we are happy to be together? Why most people be so concerned by our love? Why most we be treated as though we are some kinda abomination? Really I know there is no answer to the questions anymore, I know now that ignorance is something that can never be explained other than that, ignorance.
Maybe someday the world will be able to be educated enough to realize we are the same humans as they are. We feel and need the same as they do and even love the same as all others. We are no different and should not be forsaken for who we are. And maybe someday the world will get over our small differences to create a better world.