This contains a lot of references to a Milwaukee institution called "First Stage", a theatre academy for children and young adults. A major focus of this academy is on Shakespeare. Here is a site where you can find more information: http://www.firststage.org/
It's not really down solid yet, and it may evolve. But here is the first draft of a little sumthin sumthin I like to call...
CSI: FIRST STAGE.
Dramatis Personae
Titus Maxwell: Lieutenant of CSI: First Stage
Horatio Caine: Lieutenant of CSI: Miami (duh) heart
Portia O’Hara: Ballistics Specialist
York Westburg: Homicide Detective
Quinten Perkins: Leader of “Looking Glass” a literature based cult.
Catherine Martin: Actress portraying Gertrude
Richard Goth: Actor portraying Laertes
Gary Rightson: Actor portraying Claudius
Keith Lemmings: Actor portraying Hamlet
Julia Dolson: First Stage secretary
Heather Briley: A student from local university working in costumes
Todd Franklin: Director of Hamlet
John Falcon: First Stage headmaster
Actors
Policemen
Act 1
[the clanging of metal is heard, two actors cross swords; a rehearsal. About 10 actors are onstage, including the dueling two. The house lights are up and director TODD FRANKLIN sits and watches, looking downright giddy. Actor KEITH LEMMINGS hits RICHARD GOTH]
KEITH: Another hit; what say you?
RICHARD: A touch, a touch, I do confess.
GARY RIGHTSON: Our son shall win.
CATHERINE MARTIN: He's fat, and scant of breath.
Here, Hamlet, take my napkin, rub thy brows;
The queen carouses to thy fortune, Hamlet.
KEITH LEMMINGS: Good madam!
RIGHTSON: Gertrude, do not drink.
CATHERINE: I will, my lord; I pray you, pardon me.
RIGHTSON: [Aside] It is the poison'd cup: it is too late.
KEITH: I dare not drink yet, madam; by and by.
CATHERINE: Come, let me wipe thy face.
RICHARD: My lord, I'll hit him now.
RIGHTSON: I do not think't.
RICHARD: [Aside] And yet 'tis almost 'gainst my conscience.
[Murmurs of the play are heard out in the halls. QUINTEN PERKINS walks into the office]
QUINTEN: Is John in?
JULIA DOLSON: He’s with the improv class right now. Should I go grab him?
QUINTEN: That isn’t necessary. I’ll leave my parcel here for him.
JULIA: He’ll be back in about five. The class is almost over.
QUINTEN: I’m in a bit of a hurry.
JULIA: I’ll get it to him
QUINTEN: Thanks. [exits office]
[back to the stage. JOHN FALCON runs up to TODD FRANKLIN, whispers something, and then rushes out]
KIETH: How does the queen?
RIGHTSON: She swounds to see them bleed.
TODD: [interrupting] Okay. Guys, something very important and incredibly urgent just came up. I have to run out, hopefully not for too long. You guys just sit tight.
[he exists]
RIGHTSON: What was that all about?
CATHERINE: I’m not sure.
[back to the office, HEATHER BRILEY enters]
HEATHER: We need that black vest again. Have you seen it?
JULIA: Oh, I think that it was put back in the Prop and Costume room.
HEATHER: Do you have the key?
JULIA: Yup [throws key].
HEATHER: Thanks, I’ll bring it right back.
JULIA: Take your time.
[Cut back to the stage]
RICHARD: Hey Catherine, you feeling alright.
CATHERINE: Just a little dizzy. I’ll be alright
[cut to HEATHER opening the prop room]
[cut back to the stage]
RICHARD: Are you sure?
CATHERINE: No, no, the drink, the drink…
RICHARD: I’m serious, Catherine.
[CATHERINE shakes her head, stumbles, and then falls]
RICHARD: You better not be playin’, Catherine!
CATHERINE: [grabs RICHARD’s shoulder] [whispers] The drink, [yells]the drink! [the cast turns, most to stunned to move] I am poison'd. [dies].
RICHARD: Catherine! Jesus Christ! She’s not breathing!
RIGHTSON: What?!
[cut to the costume room, HEATHER turns on the lights to see QUINTEN lying in
a pool of blood, dead. She screams]
[cut back to the stage]
KEITH: [giving CPR] Wake up damnit!
RIGHTSON: Murther! Murther! [runs towards door] [screams] It’s locked! Help! Help!
[fast forward, YORK stands in the middle of the stage. Various actors are being interviewed by policemen or are comforting one another. TITUS and PORTIA enter]
TITUS: What have we here, York?
YORK: Well, it looks to me like homicide. Odds of a natural death here are slim to none.
TITUS: Let’s hold back our judgment until we see the evidence. What do we have?
YORK: her props, her clothes, that’s about it.
TITUS: The autopsy should reveal the cause, no obvious bullet holes or stab marks. Get her prop drink off to trace for analysis. You said there was a second one?
YORK: Hmm? Oh. Yeah, he’s down the hall.
[Enter HORATIO]
TITUS: May I help you?
HORATIO: Horatio Caine, Miami.
PORTIA: Aren’t you a little out of your jurisdiction?
HORATIO: I am looking for a Quinten Perkins, he pulled a drive-by in Miami this morning. He’s a very powerful leader of various gangs that seem to follow him like some sort of a cult. His trail seems to have brought me to your doorstep.
TITUS: Great, we’ll take it from here.
HORATIO: I’m afraid you don’t understand. The bullets that were fired during the drive-by were meant for me, but they hit a thirteen year old girl. I must bring her parents peace of mind and her killer to justice.
TITUS: [pause] alright, you can tag along with us.
HORATIO: Thank you.
[Cut to the costume room, PORTIA, TITUS, and HORATIO start wandering through the scene]
YORK: A woman from costumes found him here in the middle of the day.
PORTIA: This looks like a lot of blood for one man.
HORATIO: What smells like mint?
[PORTIA and TITUS exchange glances]
TITUS: do we have any weapons?
YORK: This switchblade was found in the body [hands baggie with bloody switchblade].
PORTIA: Then what’s that? [points to stage knife in corner] That seems very out of place, the other weapons in this shop are under lock and key. They are usually all accounted for.
TITUS: Let’s take it in with everything else.
PORTIA: Shouldn’t we just mark it as a disturbance?
TITUS: It looks more than just a disturbance.
HORATIO: I have found what smells like mint.
TITUS: Must be a huge achievement for you.
YORK: Good God! What are you doing?!
[TITUS and PORTIA turn to see HORATIO dipping his finger in the victim’s blood and tasting it]
TITUS: Horatio?
HORATIO: This is stage blood. Mint flavored stage blood.
TITUS, PORTIA, and YORK: Oh.
PORTIA: Why would you drench your victim in stage blood? I would think it would take from some valuable running away time.
HORATIO: [looks under victim’s shirt], So would this.
[he reveals the words “Speak hands for me” carved into the victim’s chest]
TITUS: Julius Caesar.
HORATIO: Indeed
PORTIA: But who would-
YORK: -excuse me, but we have just found that the body is of Quinten Perkins.
TITUS: It looks like mutiny. But this only leads to more questions.
PORTIA: Do you think the deaths are related? They are both swamped in Shakespearian references. It can’t be coincidence.
HORATIO: It just may be. Because when it comes to murder [puts on sunglasses] the play’s the thing.
[YEEAAAAHH!! Cue CSI: Miami theme. Montage of HORATIO in various poses]
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