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Really, I'm not. I'm happy. Good roommates, made new friends, okay classes. I laugh, I have fun, I'm enjoying myself.

I just can't figure out what I'm missing. Why I start feeling sad, for no apparent reason. Probably just me being bored and then moping because I'm bored. Right.

Mom tried to guilt me agian. Wanted me to tutor some kids in Hebrew because it would be good for the Temple. I haven't studied Hebrew since the 7th grade, I barely remember how to spell my own name, let alone able to teach some kids how to read. I told her that, and I also told her I wouldn't have time this semester and asked her to thank the Rabbi for the thought. That should be the end of it, right? But noooo, she had to go on about how I could use the money, how it would be a mitzvah, how it would help get them to join the Temple, how I needed to get a job sometime and stop being so lazy...

What. The. ********.

She told me that school was my number one priority when I started here. I was to concentrate on my classes and not try and get a job. I planned my schedule with that in mind. So I told her I would consider it and plan next semester accordingly.

I'm so glad that I'm the one having to worry about money when she's the one that spends it all. We get our windows retinted. Fine, we needed it, I understand. But spending the money that's been earmarked for Dave's and my education to get new french sliding doors, new windows, new skylights... all because she feels inadequate about being retired? HELL NO. Dave's going to Grad school soon, for ******** sake. That's expensive.

I get that I'm a freeloading kid, I really do, but when she complains to me about money problems when she was the one that got us THIS close to going broke? I'm not going to sit back and pretend to be happy for her, tell her how pretty they look and ooh and ahh over them. I'm not going to shut up because she doesn't want to hear it.

She went behind the family to get those ohsofabulous and expensive windows installed, she can deal with my displeasure. I'd rather her knowing what I thought than pretend to love them like she all but orders me to. She knows she did wrong, but she just won't admit it. It's driving me nuts.

She's turning into Grandma more and more everyday...

God save me from turning into my mother. Amen.