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Dammit! sigh Nothing ever gets easier. I think I need therapy or something cuz I think I'm becoming depressed...or something, cuz I seem to always be sad whenever he's around. I hate it and he does too and I know my "perpetual sadness" is jeopardizing our relationship. I HATE THIS SO MUCH!!!! stressed I am trying so hard to change, to stay positive, but it's proving to be a superhuman feat. I am putting all of my effort into becoming happy, but it's so difficult for some reason even though life is sweet, in so many ways. I mean, I'm Salutatorian of my senior class, I have $30,000 for college, I have the best boyfriend I could possibly ask for, and I have the best friends in the world. (Bloodlust in particular) What more could I ask for? Yet, I somehow find those miniscule flaws and center all of my energy around them...unconsciously, too. I truly loathe who I've become because I wasn't like this. My only hope is that I will be able to get my act together before everyone gives up on me...(not that I'd blame them of course)...I wish I could be stronger...

Posted by: Das_Doktor33 Tue May 20, 2008 @ 08:37pm

Love is life

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_Ukitake_X_
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Commented on: Wed May 21, 2008 @ 06:38pm


	maybe your "perpetual sadness" is rooted in something else, i fear perhaps, or an unavoidable event that you probably dont recognize, yet you subconciously know about it and that is what is bothering you. maybe its that everything is sweet and you dont want it to end. if its that, dont worry, your not alone. whatever it is, you probably should go do some soul searching and if possible, talk about it, its true that talking about it is better because when you do, you tend to relized whatever problem you have probably makes no sense or its not as bad as it seems. oh no, giving up is not an option.never has, and never will be.

Commented on: Fri May 23, 2008 @ 04:37am


	I of course definetly agree with Ukitake.. Don't let all these little things that can actually be fixed get you down..I believe in you M-chan and I know you will get the hang of it maybe sooner than what you might be expecting..just try to work with some of the things Ive told you...

XxBloodlust_VampxX
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