Ok...after today, I realized a whole lot of things about well myself...and if I keep them in any longer, I will end up hurting myself...
Today I realized that I am a weak person...I fall in and out of love to quick...I throw the word "love" around to casually and its killing me...My heart is a small black hole that just sucks everything around it inside just to be crushed later on in the future...My mind is a tornado, it constantly thinks and never stops...Im soooooooooo freaking bipolar that I dont even know what emotions to feel...I mean, Im lost and by the way Im messed up now, I probably wont be found forever...Im so confused about myself that basically all I know of myself is my favorite color, my name and that I like rock music...I wish things would be right...and everyday people tell me "God will help you..." but how? by making my life hell just so he can try to fix it later? I love God, but if that's his strategy, then he needs to give it up because its all working but the fixing part...I swear my life is like the color black...its just so dark right now...Why cant i make people happy...or why cant I keep myself happy...? at least for a freakin minute!!!! I know...I told my friends that I would be as happy as I could this year...but Im crumbling too much...and I dont know if I can fake my smiles any longer....
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What's inside my head...
All it really talks about is my thoughts and feelings and my day to day life. I need to let it all out somewhere, so why not choose here?
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