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Tomorrow I turn 20. And no, I'm not very happy about it right now.

You know...being twenty never actually meant anything to me, and really, it still doesn't. It's just me getting older. There's not a big thing abou tit.

It's more...well, what it's supposed to symbolize. For me, that day is supposed to be a day that I spend with those I care most about and remember why I love having them in my life.

This year...though, all I've been is sad. Like...everything I want this year, I really can't have. Like...having a dad or dad-figure, friends that somewhat seem to care (I know that one seems cruel but I have reasoning), just...things like that.

I mean...like today, I was trying to tell Lauren how upset I was because I needed to talk to someone and...well, she's my best friend right? But she was too busy talking to Lalo to really care and that made me upset.

*sighs* To ******** twenty. Woot.