FUNNY THOUGHTS
Slips and Gaffes
Accident Reports -- Descriptions of accidents as written on insurance claim forms.
Excuse Letters -- Letters from parents to teachers, excusing their children from school.
Courtroom Quotations -- Lawyers take ridiculous steps to be thorough.
Resume Quotations -- Unwise statements made on resumes and cover letters.
Patient Charts -- Doctors' remarks on patient charts.
Church Bulletins -- Unfortunately phrased announcements in church bulletins.
Classified Ads -- Classified ads that don't necessarily say what they were intended to.
News Reports -- Newspapers, radio, and television garble news reports.
Restaurants -- Blundered lines, signs, and menus at restaurants.
Spoonerisms -- Quotes with words with sitched swounds.
Words Without Thought -- Bungling the English language.
The Language Barrier -- When learning English, sometimes being close is still very far away.
Fortune Cookies -- Bizarre lines taken from actual fortune cookies.
Questions, Suggestions, and Complaints
Forest Service Feedback -- City folk suggest improvements to the outdoors.
River Guide Feedback -- People without common sense go rafting.
Tourism Follies -- People without geographic sense.
Questions Asked of Park Rangers -- Tourists who just don't get it.
Questions Asked of Librarians -- Readers who just don't get it.
Questions Asked of Cruise Ship Pursers -- Vacationers who just don't get it.
Tenant Complaints -- Tenants complain to their landlords but don't proofread.
Things Kids Say
Kids' Ideas About Love -- 5 to 10 year olds expound on love and marriage.
Kids' Ideas About Science -- 5th and 6th graders illustrate scientific principles for the layman.
Kid Quotes -- Young children make hilarious observations.
Exams and Papers -- 7th through 12th graders give creative wrong answers to exams.
Stupidity
Warning Labels -- In today's litigious society, products need ridiculously obvious instructions.
Employee Performance Evaluation Quotes -- Evaluating the performance of the less proficient employees.
Bad Predictions -- Famous last words about science and technology.
Twins -- Some people have comic ideas about what being a twin is all about.
Anecdotes of Stupidity -- In the general public, you can't hide from stupidity.
Famous People
Yogi Berra -- Verbal blunders from one of baseball's legends.
Samuel Goldwyn -- Verbal blunders from the famous movie mogul.
Eugene Ormandy -- Verbal blunders from the famous orchestra conductor.
Murray Walker -- Verbal blunders from the famous motor racing commentator.
Dan Quayle -- Verbal blunders from a notorious former Vice President.
Other Famous People -- Verbal blunders from an assortment of other celebrities and political figures.
View User's Journal
The Almost Daily Journal
My thoughts that pop into my head
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