I loved you, you made me, hate me.
You gave me, hate, see?.
It saved me and these tears are deadly.
You feel that?
I rip back, every time you tried to steal that.
You feel bad? you feel sad?
I'm sorry, hell no ******** that!
It was my heart, it was my life, it was my start, it was your knife.
This strife it dies, this life and these lies.
And these lungs have sung this song for too long,
and its true I hurt too, remember I loved you!
I've , Lost it all, fell today, It's all the same
I'm sorry oh
I'm sorry NO
I've , been abused, I feel so used, because of you
I'm sorry oh
I'm sorry NO
I wish I could I could have quit you.
I wish I never missed you,
And told you that I loved you, every time I ******** you.
The future that we both drew, and all the s**t we've been through.
Obsessed with the thought of you, the pain just grew and grew!
How could you do this to me?
Look at what I made for you,
It never was enough and the world is what I gave to you.
I used to be love struck; now I'm just ******** up.
Pull up my sleeves and see the pattern of my cuts!
I've , Lost it all, fell today, It's all the same
I'm sorry oh
I'm sorry NO
I've , been abused, I feel so used, because of you
I'm sorry oh
I'm sorry NO
Seems like all we had is over now you left to rest.
And your tears are dried up now, you just lay without a sound.
Seems like all we had is over now, you left to rest.
And my fears are over now, I can leave with my head down.
I've , Lost it all, fell today, It's all the same
I'm sorry oh
I'm sorry NO
I've , been abused, I feel so used, because of you
I'm sorry oh
I'm sorry NO
I honestly don't understand how this could've happened. There's so much anger, hatred, jealousy, confusion, depression bottled up inside of me...I honestly didn't know how to let it all out. That's part of the reason I had to put a song as most of the blog post. I can't believe he did that to me. I can't believe SHE did that to me either. It does make me wonder about him, but I don't want anything else. I want the person that I fell in love with. He's gone. He was replaced by this...something. This something that could lie to me...cheat on me...that acts like I'm either not important or simply not there. And her...the one who always told me she's been hurt this way and could never turn into something like that. She's always told me she could never hurt me, and she could never betray me. I wouldn't even wish this pain on a perfect stranger or a complete enemy...much less a "friend."
EDIT: So this morning has been almost as bad as last night. I don't feel like doing anything or going anywhere. I just feel empty. I'm entirely pathetic, but even if we are on a break I can't help myself. I love him too damn much. I've never felt this way about anyone else in my entire life. That's why I told him I'd wait for HIM to be ready...even though he hurt me. I can't help but wonder if what I'm doing is right...but I'm doing it anyway.
We make signs! PM me for more info.
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http://www.myspace.com/sarahmalaria
http://hs.facebook.com/profile.php?id=609495135