Bix looked around the side of the tree, checking Caz, Gerry and Jenz weren't around. Silence.
'Okay, they haven't found us yet.' She turned to her friend Smee, and looked down at the very battered copy of Twilight she was holding. The two girls were on the run, from their three best friends. It was lunchtime at school and it had been Gerry's idea to try and steal their Twilights. Smee and Bix had escaped down to the pond, and were now hiding behind a tall tree.
There was a loud snap and several loud hisses of SHHHHH! Bix ran to a bigger tree, but halfway there she tripped over a root and her copy of Twilight flew through the air, landing in the pond. The pond, being at school, was surrounded by a barbed wire fence to stop students from climbing in. Bix leaned far over and reached for the book. When she couldn't reach it she picked up a long stick and pulled the book towards her, then picked it up.
It was soaked through and the ink had somehow dissolved, leaving all the page blank. 'NOOOO!' Bix screamed. 'DAMN YOU THREE! DAMN YOU!' She stopped when she felt an odd sensation, like when you put your hand over a plug hole and it sticks.
As this was happening, Smee ran over and grabbed her shoulders, shaking her. 'NO! THEY ARE GOING TO FIND US!'
Suddenly, there was a loud bang and a flash of light, and the two found themselves outside a small house with a red truck parked in front of it.
Smee was still shaking Bix, while Bix was staring open mouthed at the house. She quickly pulled a box of TicTacs out of her pocket and took out three, then knocked them back like they were drugs.
She tipped another four onto her hand and waved them in front of Smee, who stopped shaking her and also knocked them back like they were drugs. She almost choked though, when she saw the house in front of her.
'I think I swallowed a TicTac because I had four before and now I only have three...OME! Is that what I think it is?'
Bix just nodded.
"We're in the Twilight universe?" Smee asked again.
Bix just nodded. Again.
In a sudden burst of energy, Smee jumped into the air and clapped her hands. She emitted an evil laugh, her manic cackle filling the night. Bix 'sssshed' her.
"Don't want to wake her," Bix explained.
"Wake who?" Smee said.
"God!" Bix said. "Bella, obviously!"
"Oh my god!" Smee said. "It's like off that advert!"
"What advert?" Bix asked.
"THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS!" Smee cackled. She rushed over to the side of the house, and jumped headfirst into a large tree that grew parallel to the wall. Bix followed, jumping and landing on top of Smee with a muffled thud. After a string of profanities (which their friend Church-Going-Gerry would be annoyed with) they managed to disentangle themselves from each other.
"Can I have my arm back?" Bix whispered urgently.
"What?" Smee said. "Oh, yeah!" She handed Bix's hand back to its owner, (which she had been gripping before with sheer excitement) and began to climb the tree. Bix followed, breathing down the back of her neck.
Smee stopped with both hands on the window sill. Bix leaned over her shoulder, fighting to keep balance because her only foothold was Smee's big toe.
"Owch," Smee said, trying to shove Bix off her big toe.
"Sssh!" Bix said, and pointed into the room. "Look!"
Smee stopped squirming and looked. And there, in the room, fast asleep, was Bella.
"Dang," was Bix's first words.
"What?"
"She is pretty," Bix said. "Now we have no chance."
"No chance? At what?"
"Are you insane?" Bix said. "Wait... I already know the answer to that."
"Which is?"
"Yes."
"Carry on..." Smee pressed.
Bix knocked back two more TicTacs before continuing. "Well, we have no chance at getting Edward now."
"Oh. My. Edward!" Smee said.
"What?"
"EVIL PLAN COMING UP!" Smee said, almost falling backwards out of the tree.
"Which is?"
"GIVE ME A TICTAC!" Smee whispered.
"That is your evil plan?" Bix said. "No offense, but that is the worst evil plan you have EVER come up with! And some of the others were pretty bad."
"Shut up!"
"I mean, look at that time you managed to get your hands on some chilli crisps! Remember what happened then?"
"COME ON, BACK TO THE PRESENT CHICKEN-BICKEN!"
"Okay, fine," Bix said. "Let's hear the plan."
"Number one: We eat more TicTacs. Number two: WE CHANGE THE FUTURE SO THAT BELLA AND EDWARD DON'T FALL IN LOVE!" This statement was followed by a vicious cackle.
"OH MY EDWARD! YOU ARE A GENIUS!"
"I know you'd notice someday!" Smee said proudly.
Bix patted her friend on the head and turned back to the window. "Now, what to do with her?"
"That's simple," Smee said. "We, ahem, dispose of her."
"Dispose of her?"
"We marry her off to Jacob."
"And how the hell can we do that?" Bix said. She took out the bible from her pocket, (well actually, it was her copy of Twilight), and flicked through it. "Looking for ideas..."
Then she stopped. Time stopped. The Tictacs stopped rattling in her pocket.
"OH MY EDWARD! OH MY CARLISLE!"
"What?" Smee said.
"MY TWILIGHT IS REWRITING ITSELF!"
And sure enough, it was. The pages that had been washed of ink beforehand were somehow now filling with neat, typed, size eleven font. Probably Comic Sans, but you never know.
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