Now I'm a little ticked because I just typed out this really long blog and the b***h closed out on me.
Yeah what I was saying before is that I'm actually happy with my life for once. That has never happened in my 15 years of life. (except when I was a baby but hell a bubble makes you happy then)
If anything coming to Chicago has pissed me off the most in the last oh say a month or so. First off everybody here treats me like I'm 10, espically my aunt. She keeps on trying to tickle me and it annoys me. The only people that can tickle me are boys and certain friends. Also I can say one thing, and 15 minutes later they'll ask the same question again, or it will be somebody else asking it. So basically every conversation I've had while I'm here, I've had 3 times. My uncle Steve. Wow I should start a new paragraph lol. He's about to die because of drugs. He's 37 and his insides are that of a man older than his father. My grandpa is 70. So he's gonna die. Can't say I'm too sad because I didn't meet him untill I was 6 cause he was in jail. My uncle Wes. Cocaine addict who eats so much its disquesting. He always talks about he is a pimp when really, he's living with two chicks who lived in a homeless shelter before his house and probabley have AIDS. I wish I was as ballin as he was lol. Now my dear old Daddy. First off, I hate him. He abused my mom, than he try's to talk like nothing happened. I don't think I've ever heard the b*****d say my name, all he calls me is 'baby girl' When to tell the truth I wanna punch him in the face. He's never been there for me before why try now? So I pretty much ignore him. My grandma is so sick. Not like cancer sick, but nervous wreck sick. All she worries about is Steve. She is 70 year's old and by the end of the year she will have had to bury 3 of her son's. Steve, Frank (died before I was born) and Arthur (never knew he existed untill like last week). But she still drives me everywhere, and it makes me sick in a way. She should be retired and living in Mississippi with my grandpa not having to worry about her kids. But instead she's up in Aurora taking care of her kids, and worrying too much about them. Now the only true person I really like at the Ferrells. My grandpa. I ask him for money, he gives me the exact amount I asked for. You could be a random stranger, ask him any question and he will give you the honest answer. He owns his own buisness and loves waking up to go to work in the morning. I think it's werid because he's in simple terms a garbage man. But when you see the paper he makes you love his job too. You figure my grandpa makes what your parents make in a year, in about a month. So he makes a little less that 200k a year or more. I wouldn't know honestly. Certain things about him aggrivate me. He has a 6th grade education, he has 1 mil+ but he lives in the ghetto. I don't mean phoenix ghetto I mean the G-H-E-T-T-O. Aurora is a small city outside of Chicago, in which I lived the first 6 years of my life in. Aurora is the ghetto, at least 7 people die a day from gang violence, and that's just what I hear about. People drug deal on corners and every night I hear the po-po sirens. He could live anywhere he wanted to, but he lives there. It's a miracle nobody has tried to rob that man I swear.
Now my trip to Ohio, I had fun (aside from that first night because of ******** Kathy) I met my friend Steff and we had a blast. And a few stomach aches, and lots of woodshavings. Only she would understand that because I'm not willing to say what happened on the internet.
But there are only a few things I really want out of my life right now. A purse, something to do with boys (but not sex), and a job.
I want a purse because it's about damn time I got one I felt comfortable with carrying everyday.
There is a boy I can't get off of my mind. And just to say this because I have a feeling of who is gonna read this, one is on my friend's list, but the other isn't. You know who you are. I'm still not sure what I wanna do, but it's not wrong to give a chance right? If you wanna know anything more about that, send a message cause I don't wanna type out another long paragraph that nobody gives a s**t about.
Now everyone who knows me knows why I said the job thing, but I'll explain some of it to ya'll that odn't know. I live alone, just me and my mom. I made my mom throw my brother out because if he was still living there I would be dead. I'm not lieing when I say I have been through so much more than anbody honestly could imagine. My mom has been through so much with my dad beating her and her son beating her and what not so I want to get a job. My mom didn't go to college so she's stuck working at GNC because it pays a lot better than anywhere else shes worked. I wanna get a job so I can pay a couple of the bills. My mom can't afford to pay all the bills so it's about damn time I stepped up. I'm finally old enough to get a job so why not? The day I turned 15 I memorized my social security number and filled out at least 4 applications. Only 1 called, and I said no to that job. I love my mom, but not enough to scrub some toilets lol. Well when I get home I gots an interview, so maybe that will work out so much better than safeway lol.
A lot of you who really know me are going to be so surprised. There is a girl named Makayla Hartsoch. She used to be my best friend untill this year she decided to be a backstabbing b***h. The entire fight is about money and she owed me some, never payed me back and so we got into an arughment. A lot came out in that fight and I'm glad me and her will never be friends like we used to be. I wasted 2 years with her, and saved her from a friendship she claimed to have hated more than anything. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about if your reading this Angela. Well in a short way to explain, she waited till the last day she left to threaten to beat the s**t out of me and basically murder me. Than she told me I was a p***y because I talked s**t behind her back. First and for most, I don't talk s**t behind backs. If I got a problem with you, I say it to your face. Don't let anybody ever say I say s**t behind backs because it's bull. So I messaged her back before she blocked me saying that she's the p***y for waiting so long to say it and blah blah blah (cause she was........right? besides I wasn't scared of her, I beat the s**t out of her when we were play wrestling at Karl's house.) Well for some strange reason, even though I did nothing but expect money SHE OWED ME from her, I apologized to her. I also apologized to Shana, but I'm glad on that. She is worth my time. I haven't talked to her since, but I apologized to her. I don't know what made me do it, and we all know I probabley didn't mean it but I did. I thought about it for one strange bored moment and she wasn't threating me. She was doing it because she grew up in a s**t home with a whore mom and 4 screaming siblings (no joke). She had sometime to take her anger out on, and she was damn right to do it, but not to a friend. She had a meaning, but not the right one ya know? So right now, to the extent of my knowledge, I have no enemies, and I'm thankful for that. The one thing I hate most in this world is being hated.
That's my life right now in a certain view. There's some more I'd like to say, but honestly I reallly shouldn't because one of the people I'd like to say about is my aunt and my cousin is on my friend's list so. Not gonna say it.
Yeah what I was saying before is that I'm actually happy with my life for once. That has never happened in my 15 years of life. (except when I was a baby but hell a bubble makes you happy then)
If anything coming to Chicago has pissed me off the most in the last oh say a month or so. First off everybody here treats me like I'm 10, espically my aunt. She keeps on trying to tickle me and it annoys me. The only people that can tickle me are boys and certain friends. Also I can say one thing, and 15 minutes later they'll ask the same question again, or it will be somebody else asking it. So basically every conversation I've had while I'm here, I've had 3 times. My uncle Steve. Wow I should start a new paragraph lol. He's about to die because of drugs. He's 37 and his insides are that of a man older than his father. My grandpa is 70. So he's gonna die. Can't say I'm too sad because I didn't meet him untill I was 6 cause he was in jail. My uncle Wes. Cocaine addict who eats so much its disquesting. He always talks about he is a pimp when really, he's living with two chicks who lived in a homeless shelter before his house and probabley have AIDS. I wish I was as ballin as he was lol. Now my dear old Daddy. First off, I hate him. He abused my mom, than he try's to talk like nothing happened. I don't think I've ever heard the b*****d say my name, all he calls me is 'baby girl' When to tell the truth I wanna punch him in the face. He's never been there for me before why try now? So I pretty much ignore him. My grandma is so sick. Not like cancer sick, but nervous wreck sick. All she worries about is Steve. She is 70 year's old and by the end of the year she will have had to bury 3 of her son's. Steve, Frank (died before I was born) and Arthur (never knew he existed untill like last week). But she still drives me everywhere, and it makes me sick in a way. She should be retired and living in Mississippi with my grandpa not having to worry about her kids. But instead she's up in Aurora taking care of her kids, and worrying too much about them. Now the only true person I really like at the Ferrells. My grandpa. I ask him for money, he gives me the exact amount I asked for. You could be a random stranger, ask him any question and he will give you the honest answer. He owns his own buisness and loves waking up to go to work in the morning. I think it's werid because he's in simple terms a garbage man. But when you see the paper he makes you love his job too. You figure my grandpa makes what your parents make in a year, in about a month. So he makes a little less that 200k a year or more. I wouldn't know honestly. Certain things about him aggrivate me. He has a 6th grade education, he has 1 mil+ but he lives in the ghetto. I don't mean phoenix ghetto I mean the G-H-E-T-T-O. Aurora is a small city outside of Chicago, in which I lived the first 6 years of my life in. Aurora is the ghetto, at least 7 people die a day from gang violence, and that's just what I hear about. People drug deal on corners and every night I hear the po-po sirens. He could live anywhere he wanted to, but he lives there. It's a miracle nobody has tried to rob that man I swear.
Now my trip to Ohio, I had fun (aside from that first night because of ******** Kathy) I met my friend Steff and we had a blast. And a few stomach aches, and lots of woodshavings. Only she would understand that because I'm not willing to say what happened on the internet.
But there are only a few things I really want out of my life right now. A purse, something to do with boys (but not sex), and a job.
I want a purse because it's about damn time I got one I felt comfortable with carrying everyday.
There is a boy I can't get off of my mind. And just to say this because I have a feeling of who is gonna read this, one is on my friend's list, but the other isn't. You know who you are. I'm still not sure what I wanna do, but it's not wrong to give a chance right? If you wanna know anything more about that, send a message cause I don't wanna type out another long paragraph that nobody gives a s**t about.
Now everyone who knows me knows why I said the job thing, but I'll explain some of it to ya'll that odn't know. I live alone, just me and my mom. I made my mom throw my brother out because if he was still living there I would be dead. I'm not lieing when I say I have been through so much more than anbody honestly could imagine. My mom has been through so much with my dad beating her and her son beating her and what not so I want to get a job. My mom didn't go to college so she's stuck working at GNC because it pays a lot better than anywhere else shes worked. I wanna get a job so I can pay a couple of the bills. My mom can't afford to pay all the bills so it's about damn time I stepped up. I'm finally old enough to get a job so why not? The day I turned 15 I memorized my social security number and filled out at least 4 applications. Only 1 called, and I said no to that job. I love my mom, but not enough to scrub some toilets lol. Well when I get home I gots an interview, so maybe that will work out so much better than safeway lol.
A lot of you who really know me are going to be so surprised. There is a girl named Makayla Hartsoch. She used to be my best friend untill this year she decided to be a backstabbing b***h. The entire fight is about money and she owed me some, never payed me back and so we got into an arughment. A lot came out in that fight and I'm glad me and her will never be friends like we used to be. I wasted 2 years with her, and saved her from a friendship she claimed to have hated more than anything. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about if your reading this Angela. Well in a short way to explain, she waited till the last day she left to threaten to beat the s**t out of me and basically murder me. Than she told me I was a p***y because I talked s**t behind her back. First and for most, I don't talk s**t behind backs. If I got a problem with you, I say it to your face. Don't let anybody ever say I say s**t behind backs because it's bull. So I messaged her back before she blocked me saying that she's the p***y for waiting so long to say it and blah blah blah (cause she was........right? besides I wasn't scared of her, I beat the s**t out of her when we were play wrestling at Karl's house.) Well for some strange reason, even though I did nothing but expect money SHE OWED ME from her, I apologized to her. I also apologized to Shana, but I'm glad on that. She is worth my time. I haven't talked to her since, but I apologized to her. I don't know what made me do it, and we all know I probabley didn't mean it but I did. I thought about it for one strange bored moment and she wasn't threating me. She was doing it because she grew up in a s**t home with a whore mom and 4 screaming siblings (no joke). She had sometime to take her anger out on, and she was damn right to do it, but not to a friend. She had a meaning, but not the right one ya know? So right now, to the extent of my knowledge, I have no enemies, and I'm thankful for that. The one thing I hate most in this world is being hated.
That's my life right now in a certain view. There's some more I'd like to say, but honestly I reallly shouldn't because one of the people I'd like to say about is my aunt and my cousin is on my friend's list so. Not gonna say it.
