Lately....I just can't seem to get a good grasp of myself. I can't seem to not smile when I think of you...you and especially you smile for the longest.....for the longest my heart has been close, closed so that no more pain could get in there. Honestly....earlier this year I felt like I couldn't take anymore. I became even more sheltered and reserved and just felt a lot more alone. I'll never forget, the day grandpa died...That's the loneliness I have ever felt. My mentor, teacher my P-pa and my friend dies and I never once got a chance to thank him for everything he has done for me. My father dies and I don't even know if he knew that all this time, I really only wanted to make him proud...I wonder if he was ever proud of me... This wasn't a fun existence and so after every crushing thing that has happened, I really wanted to give up. No....I think I gave up. But *smiles* you didn't give up on me, did you Keandre, Guernise and especially you...Dylan. It would seem that I've learned to love, To be happy and to cherish friendship to the point that I feel off when i don't have at least one of you on reserve. who would have thought that I would meet so many very special, amazing beautiful and talented people, the most awesome people ever on a website that I just happened to give a chance? For everyone else, You don't have to worry about me so much because I'm not that Lone wolf anymore...I'm your friend and For Dylan...My Issy I am happy and proud to be your Phoenix. smile I love you guys and Thanks for being there to help me piece my heart and soul back together when it was so torn and broken.
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-_- I suppose I can still add on to this. Though I doubt it turns out to be good news.
Tien Natsume Community Member |
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