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"Yo Ho, Yo Ho, A Pirates Life For Me.
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle, and loot,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot,
Drink up me 'earties, yo ho.
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We extort, we pilfer, we filch, and sack,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
Maraud and embezzle, and even high-jack,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We kindle and char, inflame and ignite,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We burn up the city, we're really a fright,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We're rascals, scoundrels, villans, and knaves,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
We're devils and black sheep, really bad eggs,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.
We're beggars and blighters, ne'er-do-well cads,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho.
Aye, but we're loved by our mommies and dads,
Drink up, me 'earties, yo ho."
......and really bad eggs
 SnoWhite06 · Wed Oct 25, 2006 @ 04:07pm · 0 Comments |
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Harry Potter & Lord of the Rings Icons |
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*Can you slam a revolving door?
*Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
*If winnie the pooh was civilized enough to keep his honey in jars, why did he eat it off his hands? Surely he had spoons?
*What happens if you get a paper cut from a Get Well card?
*Can you read a picture book?
*Why does it say "shake well" on ketchup bottles, but not ketchup packets?
**Is eating a mermaid considered cannibalism?
*Why does it say do not use before work with heavy machinery on the back of childrens tylenol? I mean..really could we save that many people by getting those darn five year-olds with headcolds off those forklifts!
*If mirrors need light to work, what happens if you put night vision goggles on in the dark and look at a mirror?
*What shape is the sky?
*Why is it written "May contain traces of peanuts or other kind of nuts" on peanut butter jars. Are people stupid enough not to realize it themselves?
*If you only have one eye...are you blinking or winking?
*If you have a gun and you ask, "can I ask you a question?" and they say "fire away" should you shoot them?
*Why are dandelions considered weeds when daisies are considered flowers?
*Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?
*Whenever an adult is kidnapped why isn't it called adultnapped??
*Why do blacklights look purple?
*Did Yankee Doodle name the feather, hat, town, or his pony Macaroni?
*Why is it that people duck in the rain, do they really think the rain won't hit them?
*If there's a hole straight through the earth, from the south pole to the north pole, and you jump through it what would happen? would you keep falling forever, or fall back down when you get to the middle, or is it physically impossible?
**If someone with a nostril ring takes it out, then blows their nose, do they have to cover that hole as well as their nostril holes so that snot does'nt blow out everywere?
*Isn't it weird that if you rearange the word "teacher" you get "cheater"?
*How come people say they ate the last piece of gum, when they really just chew it?
*If a pope goes to the bathroom, is it considered holy crap?
*You know the saying "throw ya hands in the air like ya don't care"? why bother doing that if you dont care?
*Why do water bottles have a "best if used by" date?
*Why do they put holes in crackers?
*Why can the saying "it's all downhill from here." mean both that it will be easy and that it is going to get worse?
*If all of ACME's products backfire, why does Wile E. Coyote keep buying them?
*Why does triangularly cut bread taste better than square bread?
**Is it legal to name your kid "Anonymous"?
*Why is it that no matter what color of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
*If you have a pet with 2 heads do you have to name both heads?
*How come they don't add the time that we are in our mom's to our age?
*Why do people squint their eyes when they can't see? Wouldn't that just make it less space to see out of?
*How old does something have to be to become an antique?
*Can a school teacher give a homeless child homework?
*Why do they say "an alarm going off," if it is really going on?
*Why is shampoo clear but conditioner not?
*If conjoined twins participate in sports, do they count as one or two players?
*If a singer sings their own song during a karaoke party, is it considered karaoke?
*Why do mattresses have designs on them when they're always covered with sheets?
**If you died with braces on would they take them off?
*Can someone have their head in the clouds and be down-to-earth at the same time?
*If you were a pastor, and you were getting married, would you hire a pastor, or would you do the wedding yourself?
*Is there a certain temperature at which it stops being qualified as cold? At what temperature does it qualify as hot?
*Why is most lunchmeat bigger than the bread?
*How come toy hippos are always blue, or purple, when real hippos are brown?
*You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
*After eating, do amphibians have to wait an hour before getting out of the water?
*You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?
crazythoughts.com
SnoWhite06 · Wed Aug 30, 2006 @ 10:50pm · 1 Comments |
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OTHER FRIENDS: Never ask for food
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.
OTHER FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr. and Mrs.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Call your parents mom and dad.
OTHER FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying, Damn...we ******** up...but that s**t was fun!"
OTHER FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Laugh their a** off at you for cryin cause what you just did was stupid but hilarious.
OTHER FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours.
OTHER FRIENDS: know a few things about you.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.
OTHER FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds a** that left you.
OTHER FRIENDS: Would knock on your door.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'm home!"
OTHER FRIENDS: Are for a while.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Are for life.
OTHER FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "b***h, you better drink the rest of that, you know we don't waste!!"
OTHER FRIENDS: Will talk s**t to the person who talks s**t about you.
GEORGE COUNTY FRIENDS: Will knock them the ******** out!!
SnoWhite06 · Wed Aug 02, 2006 @ 07:27pm · 0 Comments |
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Top 10 things to do with your empty Aluminum Cans! |
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Top ten things to do with your empty Aluminum Cans!
10.Build a tower.
9.Build a shed.
8.Grab a melon and go bowling!
7.Crush them to get a good workout.
6.Put it up to your ear and listen for the Ocean!
5.Build a raft and sail the Pacific!
4.Build a raft and sail the Atlantic!
3.Use them as portable restrooms.
2.Stare inside and look like an idiot!
1.Find a few friends and bang the cans together, forming a Heavy Metal Band!
SnoWhite06 · Fri Jul 28, 2006 @ 08:40pm · 1 Comments |
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annoying things to do at school |
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Annoying Things To Do At School biggrin
~organize a bunch of people in one class to emit a low humming noise, keeping straight faces.
~organize a whole bunch of people to fall off their chairs at the same time.
~organize a whole bunch of people to drop their pencils/pens at a preset time.
~superglue quarters to the floor, count how many people try to pick them up.
~write fake love notes and slip them into people's lockers
~if someone near you falls asleep in class, tie their shoelaces to the desk/chair.
~lay a paper towel roll on the floor at the top of the steps and give it a kick, making sure you've taped the loose end to the floor already.
~when you use the bathroom, get a LOT of soap on your hands (If it's the slimy kind), but don't wash it off, just leave goo all over doorknobs, railings, etc.
~screaming gibberish in crowded hallways is always good for a laugh.
~leave a Snickers bar in the toilet.
~Type every word in a different font. Alternate really big fonts with really small fonts.
~Bring candles and incense to class. Before handing in the paper, perform an elaborate ceremony, entreating the gods to bless the paper and correct all your typos.
~Carve your paper on the bathroom wall.
~Cite issues of Spiderman and Batman as resources in your bibliography.
~Come to class leading a horse or camel. When asked to turn in the paper, take it out of one of the saddlebags, then shoot the horse/camel/whatever away. Refuse to discuss it.
~Draw pictures of your teacher in the margins.
~End the paper with "This paper will self-destruct in 10 seconds".
~Get a large piece of paper or canvas. Smear paint all over it and hand it in as your paper. Explain that the topic was such an emotional one for you, and that mere words couldn't possibly express what you had to say.
~Hand your paper in in a sealed envelope with postmarks from several different countries on it. Say that you wanted several different perspectives on your work.
~If assigned a 2000-word paper, draw two pictures of what the paper was supposed to be about. After all, a picture is worth 1000 words, right?
~Make a footprint on the back of one of the pages. When questioned by the professor, act like it's nothing unusual. After all, he did tell you to include footnotes.
~Make a tape of you singing the contents of your paper, opera- style, and hand that in.
~Make your paper one long, neverending sentence that goes on for pages and pages and pages; use alot of semi-colons, commas, and other interesting, rarely-used punctuation marks [(for example), an interesting one: the colon_] but never ever end the sentence {[_-|/??!]}.
~Ol, switch alound arr the l's and r's in youl papel, rike Monty Python did in Queen Erizabeth the Thild.
~On the day the paper is due, skip into class, waving the paper and screaming, "I have a paper! I have a paper!". Run around the class a few times, then joyfully throw it out the window. Laugh and yell, "There's my paper!", then run outside to get it. Repeat this all through the period, or until the teacher throws you out.
~Paint a large white stripe down the front of your paper. Say that on the way to class, your dropped it in the street and it got run over by one of those trucks that paint lines on the road.
~Perfume the paper with catnip. Explain that it was to keep your dog from eating it.
~Poke several holes in the paper. Say that you were mobbed by crows on the way to class.
~Print all the pages on one sheet of paper, with the text overlapping. Say that that was all the paper you had.
~Put nonsense words down as quotes. Say that you are quoting the words of a well-known Zen master who was speaking in tongues at the time.
~Pwetend you have a speech impediment and awways type w's whenevew you weawwy want to type r's ow l's.
~Refer to all prominant historical figures by nicknames. For example, call George Washington "Georgie". Call Ben Franklin "Sparky".
~Refuse to do the paper on account of the fact that you are a member of Greenpeace and strongly object to the gratuitous slaughter of trees caused by the massive amount of paper used in writing assignments.
~Support your thesis with quotes from your VCR manual.
~Switch the names of prominent history figures with the names of your friends, classmates, etc. Claim that your roommate led the Spanish Armada.
~TTyyppee eevveerryy lleetttteerr ttwwiiccee..
~Tell the professor that you need an extension because one of your primary sources is an old wise man in Tibet and he won't see you until the next full moon.
~Turn in a letter you wrote to your cousin. When the teacher confronts you about it, say that you must have gotten the letter and the paper mixed up. Say that you'll turn the paper in as soon as you get it back, but your cousin lives in Siberia, so it might take a while.(This is a nifty way to get an extension.)
~Turn the paper in by making paper airplanes out of the pages of the paper and attempting to fly them onto the professor's desk.
~Type gibberish. When you hand it in, claim that your computer crashed while you were printing it, and you couldn't retrieve the original.
~When writing an especially long paper, put a recipe for chocolate cake in the middle and see if the professor notices.
~When your prof asks for an outline of your paper, draw the outline of the piece of paper you typed it on and hand it in.
~Write the entire paper on Post-it notes and turn it in by sticking them all over the teacher's door.
~Write your history paper on parchment, using a quill. Say that you were trying to get the feel for the period.
~Write your paper by cutting out words from magazines and sticking them on the page, ransom-note style.
SnoWhite06 · Fri Jul 28, 2006 @ 08:20pm · 1 Comments |
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Fred and George Weasley
Quotes:
"Are you trying to weasel out of showing us any of this stuff?" said Zacharias Smith.
"Here's an idea," said Ron loudly, "why don't you shut your mouth?"
"Well, we've all turned up to learn from him, and now he's telling us he can't really do any of it," he said.
"That's not what he said," said Fred Weasley.
"Would you like us to clean out your ears for you?" inquired George, pulling a long and lethal-looking metal instrument from inside one of the Zonko's bags.
"Or any part of your body, really, we're not fussy where we stick this," said Fred.
"You don't want to bottle your anger up like that, Harry, let it all out," said Fred, beaming. "There might be a couple people fifty miles away who didn't hear you."
"--but you get these massive pus-filled boils too," said George, "and we haven't worked out how to get rid of them yet."
"I can't see any boils," said Ron, staring at the twins.
"No, well, you wouldn't," said Fred, "they're not in a place we generally display to the public --"
"-- but they make sitting on a broom a right pain in the --"
"So top grade's O for 'Outstanding,'" she [Hermione] was saying, "and then there's A-"
"No, E," George corrected her, "E for 'Exceeds Expectations.' And I've always thought Fred and I should've got E in everything, because we exceeded expectations just by turning up for the exams."
"George," said Fred, "I think we've outgrown a full-time education."
"Yeah, I've been feeling that way myself," said George lightly.
"Time to test our talents in the real world, d'you reckon?" asked Fred.
"Definitely," said George.
And before Umbridge could say a word, they raised their wants and said together, "Accio Brooms!"
Harry heard a loud crash somewhere in the distance. Looking to his left he ducked just in time -- Fred and George's broomsticks, one still trailing the heavy chain and iron peg with which Umbridge had fastened them to the wall, were hurtling along the corridor toward their owners. They turned left, streaked down the stairs, and stopped sharply in front of the twins, the chain clattering loudly on the flagged stone floor.
"We won't be seeing you," Fred told Professor Umbridge, swinging his leg over his broomstick.
"Yeah, don't bother to keep in touch," said George, mounting his own.
Fred looked around at the assembled students and at the silent, watchful crowd.
"If anybody fancies buying a Portable Swamp, as demonstrated upstairs, come to number ninety-three Diagon Alley -- Weasley's Wizard Wheezes," he said in a loud voice. "Our new premises!"
"Special discounts to Hogwarts students who swear they're going to use our products to get rid of this old bat," said George, pointing at Professor Umbridge.
"STOP THEM!" shrieked Umbridge, but it was too late. As the Inquisitorial Squad closed in, Fred and George kicked off from the floor, shooting fifteen feet into the air, the iron peg swinging dangerously below. Fred looked across the hall at the poltergeist bobbing on his level above the crowd.
"Give her hell from us, Peeves."
And Peeves, whom Harry had never seen take an order from a student before, swept his belled hat from his head and sprang to a salute as Fred and George wheeled about to tumultuous applause from the students below and sped out of the open front doors into the glorious sunset.
SnoWhite06 · Fri Jun 30, 2006 @ 01:48pm · 2 Comments |
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104ways to annoy/harass/disgust/generally scare LuciusMalfoy |
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104 ways to annoy/harass/disgust/generally scare Lucius Malfoy
1. Sit next to him
2. Scoot closer to him
3. Tell him blonde jokes
4. Make him watch The Music Man
5. Make him write a paper on his predictions of what will happen in the relationship of Professor Harold Hill and Marion Paroo
6. When hes sleeping, braid his hair into a hippie style
7. Drug him and get him a fro/ a bob / a crew cut / a Mohawk or (my personal favorite) a perm
8. Replace his Snakey Cane with a walker
9. Compare the Malfoy Manor with a Barbie Dream Home
10. Compare him to Ken
11. Compare him to Barbie.
12. Poke him
13. Poke him some morewith his own cane
14. Ask him what kind of statement hes making with the black
15. Ask him if hes a goth
16. Ask him if hes an emo
17. Take him to a LOTR convention and tell people hes Legolas
18. Ask him what he does with his cane
19. Cower in fear at what he does with his cane
20. Tell him to watch HAIR
21. Ask him why he keeps getting eluded by teenagers
22. Tell him to get a catch phrase
23. Pack him a lunch for his DE meetings and tell him to share his Twinkie with Rudolphus
24. When he looks disgusted threaten him with hair dye
25. PINK hair dye
26. Sing Good Morning Starshine at the top of your lungs during his important dinner parties
27. Replace his hair gel with Hair-B-Gone
28. Wear your MUGGLE t-shirt and prance around with him during his rounds
29. When washing his clothing, accidentally spill bleach on his robes
30. When he wears his new white clothes, tell him its after Labor Day and he should now the rules of fashion
31. Steal his socks
32. When he asks about his socks tell him it was the laundry fairy
33. Put his underwear in the freezer
34.Insist that he has a secret admirer when he finds your melted chocolate hearts in his seat cushions
35. Try to read him Rapunzel and try to spot things that connect to his life
36. Point these factors out to him
37. Nickname him Lucy
38. When you go somewhere and return to the Barbie Dream HoI meanMalfoy Manor yell LUCY, IM HOOOOME!
39. Get him a pet guppy (yes a guppy, with a G)
40. Tell him its for a lesson in responsibility
41. Replace all of his expensive alcoholic beverages with Diet Coke
42. Make a secret base under the Malfoy Manor for all the Death Eater meetings and call it the Snakey Cave (base it on the Bat Cave)
43. Call Lucy a suck up
44. Ask him why he doesnt have a real snake
45. Tell himyellow is the new black
46. Give him gold stars when hes good
47. When hes good for an entire week give him a gold badge saying IM REACHING FOR THE STARS!
48. Insist his Malfoy Research Booklet is a diary
49. Read his diary and make punctuation, spelling and grammatical corrections
50. Add notes to the sides with your comments
51. Make them sound corny
52. Give him a theme song
53. When he comes into a room, play the theme song
54. Refer to him as a Girly Man in an Arnold Schwarzenegger accent
55. Put gum in his hair
56. When he looks sad, play the violin mournfully
57. When he looks happy, do the Mexican Hat Dance around him
58. At Christmas time, decorate his house with bald, skinny, snake-like Santas and when he asks, tell him to have a Very Voldy Christmas!
59. Glue a galleon to the floor and watch him struggle to get it off
60. Tell him if he grew out his hair and got a perm he could be Robert Plant
61. Embroider lace and sequins on to his Death Eater robes
62. Show him your Happy Puppets and tell him itll help his anxieties
63. Replace all of his bondage equipment with your McDonalds Happy Meal toys collection
64. Write him poetry
65. Bad poetry
66. Announce, loudly and in public, that you saw him in the Peter Pan movie
67. Bake him Get-Happy-Brownies when his plans are foiled
68. Make him eat your Chocolate Surprise
69. After he eats it, scoot closer to him and tell him chocolate is an aphrodisiac
70. Get him a kitten and tell him petting animals relieves the soul of tension and the build up of nerves
71. Tape Kick Me on the back of his Death Eater robes
72. Pierce his ears and tell him to Get his bling on
73. Ask him if he remembers the 60s
74. Misspell his name as Luscious and insist it was an accident
75. Label all drawer, cabinets, shelves and rooms with Post-Its
76. Cover his room in Gryffindor colors
77. As an excuse, insist that he is an autumn, not a winter
78. Play Platinum Blonde Life when hes feeling exceptionally super model-ish
79. Tell him his diet isnt working
80. Tell him he has split ends
81. Tell him hed look wonderful in Gucci
82. Boxers or Briefs
83. Tell him, for every bad word that he says, he owes you a knut
84. Turn his closet into a Voldemort shrine
85. Make him balloon animals and load them all into his room
86.Make him Jell-O
87. When he refuses to eat it, look hurt and tell him But everybody has room for Jell-O!
88. Get him a stress ball
89. Name it Sherman
90. Enroll him in pilates
91. Get him a subscription to Cosmo Girl
92. Get him a heart-shaped locket with an L on it
93. Give away his Snakey Cane to evil unicorns with gummy bears and a mind for Boggle
94. Make him a member of SPEW
95. Ask him what his astrological sign is then read him his compatibility charts everyday
96. Go Professor Trelawney on his a**
97. Fix his hair into flower barrettes while hes stunned and spray paint all the mirrors black.
98. Shower him with Lysol after he comes back from a DE meeting
99. After he laughs maniacally, offer him a Tic-Tac
100. Pluck his eyebrows all off and dye his hair brown
101. Tell him hes the Mona Lisa
102. Exchange his cane for an umbrella (tell him its more practical)
103. When hes hung over sing (very loudly) Oklahoma
104. If youre not dead yetbe alive
thanks to amanda who sent this to me heart
SnoWhite06 · Fri Jun 30, 2006 @ 01:28pm · 1 Comments |
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