It has been so long.
I can't believe all of this has happened.
In case you guys were even wondering...
I'm now sixteen.
I live in Robbinsville, North Carolina.
Last year, I lived with my dad in a little place called Houma, Louisiana.
I left there to come here and take care of my mom.
No, she's not ill.
She's just a bit off in the head.
She can't live without me.
No matter how much mental abuse it puts on me to live in a dysfunctional house-hold, I take it. I love my mother.
I can't handle not being with her, which makes her sad.
I try and be a good girl... I don't want to make my family hate me.
I try and make good grades, and do as I'm asked.
But often times, what I try to do doesn't really matter.
Something else goes wrong.
But I learn to just deal with it and put it in the back of my mind, instead of dwelling on it.
Some say that not thinking about your problems is unhealthy... but I generally just tell them they're insane and continue about my way.
My little brother is seven now.
He's a bit of a brat.
But I love him anyway.
My grandpaw is a miserable man.. but I love him anyway.
My grandmother is a bi-polar woman who refuses to be medicated, and I think she might also have schizzophrenia..
But I love her anyway.
No matter how much anyone does to me and I've cared about them, in the least bit, I still love them.
I may be angry, but I will never turn my back on my loved ones.
My friends are all loved ones to me.
I take pictures of me and my friends so I'll have something to look back on when they leave me. Which is inevitable.
Because I'm easily left.
People claim to care...
But no one ever takes the chance to get to know me.
And I'm fine with that..
Well, probably not.
But I don't worry about it. If I did I would be much more miserable.
I like to let people think I'm all happy and smiles and that I don't care.. so people don't worry about me.
It's a lot easier that way. If people worried, then they'd probably make me think they cared.
And falsehoods are never fun when you're fragile-minded like myself.
 xXxLife_Is_HellxXx · Wed Sep 16, 2009 @ 01:54am · 0 Comments |
