Editing in the working sweatdrop
I'nm taking entries from your old journal,hope you dont mind.
Apirl 16th 2005
Quote:
Vacation
Well I'm on vacation in Tennesse. It took like 12 hours to get here. Now I'm bored and I miss Chris so badly. I just want this week to end soon.
I LOVE YOU CHRIS
Well I'm on vacation in Tennesse. It took like 12 hours to get here. Now I'm bored and I miss Chris so badly. I just want this week to end soon.
I LOVE YOU CHRIS
Remeber that I do, you weere so happy that you were comming home that day and I was waiting. you were looking foward to see me you cryed in my arms when you got home. I felt alot of love there and I know you did too let me remind you of that when I get the chance.
Apirl 12th 2005
Quote:
Why?
Why must I always be torn between my friends and family? I want my friends to be alright (you guys know who you are), and I want my Mom and Dad to stop treating me and my b/f like crap. I just want every thing to be alright again. My friends in school left me because of some Cosmo b****. Now I don't have any friends there except the Seniors and I don't have lunch with any of them. I wont change the fact that I hate her just so that my so called friends will let me back at the table that I have been at since freshmen year (I'm now a Junior). My Dad always complains about me and Chris not having a job and yet he doesn't have one himself. I'm about ready to run away, but something keeps holding me back. Something keeps saying that if I left that this family would really just fall even more apart than it already is.
I'm sick and tired of being the only one in my house that wants to just be myself and not try to be whats cool by listening to the junk that my family listens too (remember this from a past entry). My family makes me feel like crap everytime I'm home, and the only thing that makes my day better is seeing Chris. He's my only ray of hope in this god forsaken world. I can never lose him. If I do I don't know what I would do.
As I write this entry I am crying, because no one cares for my except for maybe six people in this world. Chris, my love, Javy, my good friend, Trine, my other good friend, Brad, my best friend, Jeroen, my only friend that could possibly know what I'm going through, and Os-taku, my little gaian brother. You guys are the only ones that make me feel better, When I talk tou you I feel like I actually belong somewhere. Why must I constantly hide everything away only to reveal it later in a very upsetting journal entry.
I wish that I could have all my friends together just to hang out. I would love too see you all in person. Just one time, but I know that that wouldn't be possible because many of my friends live too far a way to make it here to Southbridge.
Please help me through this.
Why must I always be torn between my friends and family? I want my friends to be alright (you guys know who you are), and I want my Mom and Dad to stop treating me and my b/f like crap. I just want every thing to be alright again. My friends in school left me because of some Cosmo b****. Now I don't have any friends there except the Seniors and I don't have lunch with any of them. I wont change the fact that I hate her just so that my so called friends will let me back at the table that I have been at since freshmen year (I'm now a Junior). My Dad always complains about me and Chris not having a job and yet he doesn't have one himself. I'm about ready to run away, but something keeps holding me back. Something keeps saying that if I left that this family would really just fall even more apart than it already is.
I'm sick and tired of being the only one in my house that wants to just be myself and not try to be whats cool by listening to the junk that my family listens too (remember this from a past entry). My family makes me feel like crap everytime I'm home, and the only thing that makes my day better is seeing Chris. He's my only ray of hope in this god forsaken world. I can never lose him. If I do I don't know what I would do.
As I write this entry I am crying, because no one cares for my except for maybe six people in this world. Chris, my love, Javy, my good friend, Trine, my other good friend, Brad, my best friend, Jeroen, my only friend that could possibly know what I'm going through, and Os-taku, my little gaian brother. You guys are the only ones that make me feel better, When I talk tou you I feel like I actually belong somewhere. Why must I constantly hide everything away only to reveal it later in a very upsetting journal entry.
I wish that I could have all my friends together just to hang out. I would love too see you all in person. Just one time, but I know that that wouldn't be possible because many of my friends live too far a way to make it here to Southbridge.
Please help me through this.
Remer this tammy you hated you life so much that I was your ray of hope smile Let me be that ray agian and prove that you will always have someone there for you to hold you and hug you when the time comes.
Apirl 9th 2005
Quote:
Walk Around Town
Me and Chris went for a walk the other night, around 3am. It was fun. We went up a big hill and looked out over the town. It was so pretty. It was raining that night so it was still wet out and we saw lots of worms moving around and we heard lots of little frogs in the woods. It was so quiet and peaceful because everyone was asleep and we were the only ones out.
When we got home we went to bed and heard the alarm go off. I think there was a four alarm fire that night. We took the walk on Thursday because we were bored and I didn't have school on Friday, there was a teacher thing going on. We walk around town all the time because we get bored at home and we want to get away for a little while.
Me and Chris have been together for 6 months now. I want to be with him forever.
Me and Chris went for a walk the other night, around 3am. It was fun. We went up a big hill and looked out over the town. It was so pretty. It was raining that night so it was still wet out and we saw lots of worms moving around and we heard lots of little frogs in the woods. It was so quiet and peaceful because everyone was asleep and we were the only ones out.
When we got home we went to bed and heard the alarm go off. I think there was a four alarm fire that night. We took the walk on Thursday because we were bored and I didn't have school on Friday, there was a teacher thing going on. We walk around town all the time because we get bored at home and we want to get away for a little while.
Me and Chris have been together for 6 months now. I want to be with him forever.
Do you remeber this smile the fun times we hade together walking at night in the summer time. I bet you do remeber because I know you charished it. you and me were on that hill looking down and I remeber we both felt like something speacial like in them animes when you see the two lovers standing next to each othere and they feel like they want that moment to never end,but last forever well that is how I felt Maybe you did to.
March 28th 2005
Quote:
Sprain
I sprained my ankle Friday night. I was at Jeff's party and we were all running around outside. Well atleast I got to play DBZ with everyone, which was cool. Even though I never won. I had a lot of fun at the party, I'm glad I'm finally accepted amoung a group of people. The thing that sort of shocked me was that after they had goten done running around outside they noticed that I wasn't there. None of my other friends ever noticed, which usually pissed me off. I'm glad they all like me for who I am. I was the only girl at the party.
I sprained my ankle Friday night. I was at Jeff's party and we were all running around outside. Well atleast I got to play DBZ with everyone, which was cool. Even though I never won. I had a lot of fun at the party, I'm glad I'm finally accepted amoung a group of people. The thing that sort of shocked me was that after they had goten done running around outside they noticed that I wasn't there. None of my other friends ever noticed, which usually pissed me off. I'm glad they all like me for who I am. I was the only girl at the party.
Remeber the party I know I do we hade a load of fun !! You even hade fun playing Dbz something I thought you would not do at all. See you were glad you were accepted and happy I did it I brought all these people to you. when you hurt your self evenone did notice you were gone .. so see you hade friend Imade you happy to have friends Dont you want me to make you happy agian?
March 15 2005
Quote:
Boredom
I get so bored sometimes that I start biting my nails. Then I would stare off into space or I would start doing something and quickly get bored of that. I get so bored that my mind freezes up and then Chris thinks that I'm ignoring him. Then he feels that I'm bored off him. I'm not, I could never get bored of him.
Everyday since I think the 6th grade I've had this headache. It makes me feel like my head is going to explode. I've had a CAT scan done and the doctors don't know whats wrong. I've even had my eyes checked. I wish I knew why I have these headaches.
Chris is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. We love each other so much. I feel so lonely when he isn't with me. I know that when I rp on gaia he gets upset that I am doing it but I can't help it I try to stop for a while but I start to get bored. I wish he could understand that i like rping and that I get to wrapped up in what I am doing, but he wont tell me to stop when I'm too into the rp I am doing. I'm sorry Chris. I will try to rp less.
I hate my sister, she is so dumb she's the "cute" kid. I hate people like that. She is so popular and she doesn't care that she is dumb. She listens to the dumbest music too. Usher and stuff like that, she is so dumb. She left my side of music for the other side. She used to like cool music like Linkin Park and Limp Bizkit, but she went to Usher. She's a little poser. She is acting like all the other people in my town, for those of you who don't know my town is full of Puerto Ricans. So you can basically see why me and my group of friends are so outcasted in my town.
My friends and I are different from the rest of the town. Something that is really cool is that they all like me for who I am, me and all my boyishness.
Any questions about me. Ask me in a Pm or just keep it to yourself. Privacy is always wanted for myself.
I get so bored sometimes that I start biting my nails. Then I would stare off into space or I would start doing something and quickly get bored of that. I get so bored that my mind freezes up and then Chris thinks that I'm ignoring him. Then he feels that I'm bored off him. I'm not, I could never get bored of him.
Everyday since I think the 6th grade I've had this headache. It makes me feel like my head is going to explode. I've had a CAT scan done and the doctors don't know whats wrong. I've even had my eyes checked. I wish I knew why I have these headaches.
Chris is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me. We love each other so much. I feel so lonely when he isn't with me. I know that when I rp on gaia he gets upset that I am doing it but I can't help it I try to stop for a while but I start to get bored. I wish he could understand that i like rping and that I get to wrapped up in what I am doing, but he wont tell me to stop when I'm too into the rp I am doing. I'm sorry Chris. I will try to rp less.
I hate my sister, she is so dumb she's the "cute" kid. I hate people like that. She is so popular and she doesn't care that she is dumb. She listens to the dumbest music too. Usher and stuff like that, she is so dumb. She left my side of music for the other side. She used to like cool music like Linkin Park and Limp Bizkit, but she went to Usher. She's a little poser. She is acting like all the other people in my town, for those of you who don't know my town is full of Puerto Ricans. So you can basically see why me and my group of friends are so outcasted in my town.
My friends and I are different from the rest of the town. Something that is really cool is that they all like me for who I am, me and all my boyishness.
Any questions about me. Ask me in a Pm or just keep it to yourself. Privacy is always wanted for myself.
Remeber this .. look at what you saida bout me " I'm the greatest thing and I feel lonely when he si not around" I know you are confused now about this fight but look at how much you cared for me .. are you gonna let a stupid thing I do ruin something so great for you.
March 11 2005
Quote:
Love
5 months with the one you love is a truely wonderful thing. Me and Chris have been together for 5 months. The 6th of March was the official 5 month aniveresry.
5 months with the one you love is a truely wonderful thing. Me and Chris have been together for 5 months. The 6th of March was the official 5 month aniveresry.
look at what you wrote .. you loved me so much that you were always writing dow our annies for each month now if that dosen't tell me that ou cared then IDK what does.
September 6 2005
Quote:
D: I can't think of a title.
My mom thinks that I don't get sleep when Chris stays over. When the reality of the whole thing is that I am loosing sleep. I may get 5 to 6 hours of sleep a night, because I go to bed at 10, do my summer reading, that should have been done weeks ago, for about an hour, then I lay in my bed till about 1. I wake up a 5:30. With Chris here I would go to bed about the same time and I would fall asleep about 2 hours earlier. How can this be helping me? D:
My mom thinks that I don't get sleep when Chris stays over. When the reality of the whole thing is that I am loosing sleep. I may get 5 to 6 hours of sleep a night, because I go to bed at 10, do my summer reading, that should have been done weeks ago, for about an hour, then I lay in my bed till about 1. I wake up a 5:30. With Chris here I would go to bed about the same time and I would fall asleep about 2 hours earlier. How can this be helping me? D:
ok do you remeber this you loved it when I was over you always said that you got to lseep more and everything .. I think it is because you saw me a a guardian angel. Well let me be your angel agian so I can protct you.
Well I hope you hade fun remeber these time because I want t ohave them more in the future. I know you want time alone and time to thinkbut let me leave you with all fo this .. a little mini book of the fun tims we hade and sometimes that you never want to let go .. dont forget them because you know you loved me then and I still believe you do know I will be your angel .. your everything I just want you to remeber that and Always remeber I'll be there for you to be by your side through thin kand thin . and when you never someone to cry onto I'll be your tissue.
Well I guess that is all for now I hope you comment because I did this at 5 in the morning now back toDDR!!!! D:<
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