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This week has been one whole utter, complete disaster.

I freaked out about my video project, and I couldn't find my harmonium polo for the concert. I was freaking out about missing my lessons. And furthermore, I had at least three panic attacks this week from all these things combined into one big mess.

Also, Giovanni up and decides he hates me. again. Also, I realize, he's only nice to me when other people aren't around to see him or when we're alone. He makes me feel invisible when other people are around and treats me like s**t.

And to top it all off, my grandfather just died this morning. I was supposed to be with him this weekend. And we didn't take the trip to rhode island to see him. now he's gone, and the funeral is on Wednesday (and I miss more school--whoopee. stare ).

I feel like s**t in a bag now.