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Totally tired out and just sitting around, being my unhappy self. I don't think realitiy is going to hit me untill it's too late because I'm still wanting to keep pushing for my dreams but I'm not good enough...

Not only am I not gorgeous but also a clutz beyond repair. My audition at K-State was so pathetic compared to everyone else, that I was most likely crossed off the list first for scholarship money, haha. Yeah, Abbey can't act, she can't do s**t. That's what she can do, nothing. Yay for having no talent and yay for never being able to acomplish anything.

Life's like a river boat. You keep on sailing untill you tip over but you learn to drain out the water and keep traveling down that hetic path. Sometimes it's always turning over for me and it just doesn't keep on going the way it should. Were given one chance to live life and mine just ends up being crummy.

Sometimes I wish I could just run into a big old patch of sunflowers, in the middle of no where. Just run with the sun shinning down and no one around to judge me for what I look like or my clutzy self. No one can lie to my face and say: "Your smart" or "Your so good at acting" because it's not true. They know I just guess up everything when it comes to homework and people my age, they can do awhole lot better of a job than I could learn to do in acouple of years.

Ya know, I'm falling behind in school so much that all my straight A's are dropping to B's. My self estem is so low, that I couldn't even pick up the script of GiGi for broadway and dance to the night we invented champaign. It's plan as it can be, they thought of you and me, the night they invented champaign...