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Yesterday night: tried to do my homework in complete silence. I couldn't really do my homework because I guess I just daydream, but its not like daydreaming, its more like thinking of the negative side of alot that has happened or what will happen, so of course I get depressed angry and sad, I had this salad but it was so disgusting so I pretty much threw up and just layed in bed for 2 hours thinking and crying most of the time. (I am never doing my homework in silence again)

Morning: Woke up at 6:36am from the alarm, I let it ring about 300 times then got up and slammed it then got dressed.

Essential Math - Finally met the real teacher we were supposed to have, we got new sets and I was placed in the center of the class with 3 others and I almost started to cry cause I hate the middle, I want to be in the corners or far from everyone and just sit silently or something.
Then we had to do a name game where we had to introduce someone we know in the class and their interest. I had to do this kid named Anthony and his interest is Sports but when I said that I was like "this is Anthony and he likes to play sports"
Of course it was a bad time for me, I had my head down the whole time and I was just out of it. I kept getting the feeling something happened so I don't know!

ELP - I just sat at the very far side of the class and just read Kim: Empty Inside

U.S. History - just changed seats again but I have my same seat so its okay, we took some notes and watched some movie on the Stock Market then took a test on it afterwards....

Lunch - Went to the library and was looking for more books by Beatrice Sparks but couldn't find any.
Anora came and I looked at her and then turned back to looking for the books but we had a tiny convo that went like:
Anora: Hey Whats up?
Me: Hey........uh....nothing
Anora: So when are you moving?
Me:........uh......*shrug*
Anora: Do you really wanna move?
Me:.....................................................um in a way I don't but I kinda do, this place has been kinda hell.
*Anora hits me in the shoulder 3 times then without looking at her I just shrug, she walks down the aisle and turns around and I look at her*
"Your just trying to make me cry!"
*she walks away*

Digital Art ROP: Just make pictures....nothing new...

After School: when I leave I see Giovanni who is one of the only 4 friends I have and talk to him for awhile telling him that we have a 4 month essay report and hes got to do this and its due tomorrow. then I get on the bus and Alex sits next to me, but nowadays I just want to be alone when it comes to people who know Christian, because I don't want to be friends with Christians friends, I don't want to have any part in what hes got, I want make my own friends.

Now: I am doing my homework, feeling kinda crummy and getting worse and worse I need to talk to someone who can lift my head up. because nowadays I just look down and I am probably so far down I am laying down. Kinda like that time when I couldn't eat for 3 weeks and I got majority sick and I spent most of the time sleeping and crying or reading books. I didn't wanna talk to anyone I just wanted to be alone.

Yeah, I am kinda in a horrible mood, I don't want to hear christian, I don't want Brien coming over, I don't want to hear mom yelling or grandma bitching. I don't want joel drinking my stuff or anything like that. I want to just either lay down and die or just be alone from Dad, Mom, Christian, Mario, Mikey, Alex, Anora, Terra, Tony, all the adults in my family, Mellisa, Oscar, Thomas, Andrew, Brianna, Carmina, Becky, and everyone else I know in person other than David, Ferdi, Giovanni, Rafael, Kristen, David (VHS), Tarah and Cameron >_<

forget it.... crying