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Yet another painc attack

how come when anything good ever happens to me I have to go andruin it? Why am I like this? Why everytime I make a choice is it wrong? Why am I always wrong? STOP IT STOP HuRTING ME!!!!

******** whats wrong with me why am I liek this make it stop pls make it stop.

Of youa llwanted me to kill myself you should have just said so not put me through all this pain what did I do wrong this time?

if no one on here loves me why do I get on? Why do i bother trying to be happy this is why life is pointlesss this is why i should kill myself.

I keep thinking "no they woudn't do this to me" but then why does it hurt so much?
I just want to find someone that cares aboyt me whats so wrong with that notyhing can help me now not manson not satan, and not god. I feel that it's to late for me for me to able to be happy I've been hurt so much.