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Am I being fought over *(pre-maturely) flattered*

yes?

I've got plenty more where that came from...hahahahahahaha

If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind people and pinching them is probably a joke that gets old real fast.

When this girl at the art museum asked me whom I liked better, Monet or Manet, I said, "I like mayonnaise." She just stared at me, so I said it again, louder. Then she left. I guess she went to try to find some mayonnaise for me.

.... ninja ......'course not......
"One set of hands at work will accomplish more than a thousand clasped in prayer."

I found a (sort of...kind of) relevant one!

When Gary told me he had found Jesus, I thought, Yahoo! We're rich! But it turned out to be something different.

Ohh good one. I should warn you guys that I'm taken though. Have fun fighting PoeticVengance for me. (Previously known as TheFiresofStupid)

Er...um... Personal Quote! "Faith is a poor substitute for evidence, especially given the charges"

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."

"I do not believe in the creed professed by the Jewish church, by the Roman church, by the Greek church, by the Turkish church, by the Protestant church, nor by any church that I know of... Each of those churches accuse the other of unbelief; and for my own part, I disbelieve them all." -Thomas Paine

If going to church makes you a christian, does going into a garage make you a car?

Organized religion is a crutch and a sham for the weak minded.

Jesse Ventura

QUOTE WARS!

"If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?"

I'll leave you with one piece of wisdom that has been passed down for generations in my family.

"If God is a guy...and God loves me...does that mean God is gay for me?"

actually I just made that one up...lol
I'm going to sleep...g'night

I've seen something like it before.....

Oh, well. My two cents:

"Those who will not reason, are bigots, those who cannot, are fools, and those who dare not, are slaves." -Lord Byron

oh...one more...

Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it, religion has actually convinced people that there's an INVISIBLE MAN...LIVING IN THE SKY...who watches every thing you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten special things that he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish where he will send to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry for ever and ever 'til the end of time...but he loves you.
-George Carlin

"It is inherently impossible to force someone to truly believe anything. However, indoctrinating a child into a religion before they are capable of understanding such abstract concepts is nothing less than brainwashing." -Lykus

Galileo FTW

"Surely, God could have caused birds to fly with their bones made of solid gold, with their veins full of quicksilver, with their flesh heavier than lead and with their wings exceedingly small. He did not, and that ought to show something. It is only in order to shield your ignorance that you put the Lord at every turn to the refuge of a miracle."

"...Faith moves no mountains but puts mountains where there are none: a quick walk through a madhouse enlightens one sufficiently about this." -Nietzsche

"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours." -Stephen F. Roberts

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away." - Phillip K d**k

"Science tries to prove itself wrong, in order to get everything right.
Fundamentalism tries to prove itself right, by trying to prove science wrong.
Only one approach works…" - Unknown

Take your pick 3nodding