(i'm not whinning just ranting so that i can get it off my chest and really think)
I'm starting to get worried I don't know if i really love my boyfriend (god i hate that word it makes me feel like a prep!) anymore i'm not sure i think somethings changed but i'm not sure i've just realised lately that i don't really care if i talk to him or not i'm fine if i don't but i'm happy if i do maybe it's b/c subconisously i keep my mind off him but i'm not sure i mean i'm not sure if i really love him with what my sister says and with the perfect way things are going i swear i'm starting to wonder if i don't love him as i should but as a friend but at the same time i love it when he hugs me and kisses me and i love to hear his voice and talk about his day and oddly enough i love how we argue everyday lol . but i never think about him all day or he just pops up in my head no i don't think about hi at all till someon asks me about him or about the ranks he gave me but i feel like i'm cheating him because i don't have him on my mind 24/7 then again i never had anyone on my mind 24/7 i know he loves me and i have no doubt in that but i have so much doubt in myself that i dunno anymore.....i'm scared...i'm scared that i don't love him but i want to be with him because he's the only one i can be myself with and make mistakes argue with and he never gets angry he never yells at me and he never gets jealous he's good to me and always asks my oppion before doing something and loves me unconditonialy maybe i do but i don't know hmmm well namely i don't feel overly excited when i talk to him nor overly sad when i don't... i just know i care about him so much but is it love i dunno anymore.....
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