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Last night I was thirsty so I got up and went to get a drink. I was running down the hall and I forgot about the chai at the end of it. I smashed my balls against the left arm of the chair. I know it's a stupid story, but I just had to share it.

Oh and a couple weeks ago I had to take a piss at night. When I got to the bathroom I didn't want to turn the light on cause it's like a fan and it's noisy. So I took a piss in the dark. I was looking into the toilet and it was like, whoa, what if there's a monster in there........" I hope he doesn't like sausage." I had some crazy thoughts going through my head. But don't worry ladies, the monster didn't get me. rofl