I get it.... if you're ever going to feel anything for me, it's not going to be because of anything I do. I've tried, and tried... and acted foolishly. Selfishly. It's hard... but I need to accept that maybe... there will never be anything ever again. It's hard, and I don't want to... but I can't project my own feelings onto the situation. Whatever you feel for me... it's not the same as what I feel. It hurts... but I can't force anything. Everytime I think of the past, and you, it hurts. I know the difference between how you looked at me then... and now. You don't see me the way you used to. You don't want this.
Ah... but what can I do? Should I just seal it all inside? I don't want to lose you, after all...
I'll try to do what's best for everyone.
I'll become stronger... I promise.
(Today is the same day I told you I first loved you back in 2012. Has it really been 6 years now...? Do you remember that day? You kissed me and said it back. I never forgot that moment, even when I was angry with you. All of our memories together I cherished even when I thought I'd never want you back....... I wish you did too.)
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These are the records of certain occurrences and musings in my life. It is probably not of much importance to you, unless you enjoy being a sleuth or have some vague interest in listening to me prattle about my flavour-of-the-month.
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