I feel like venting so...
If I vent on Facebook I'll just get s**t for it, especially from my parents.
Being a vegetarian, trying to be pale, and figuring out my sexuality, is probably the most toughest modifications I'm going through right now.
My family is mostly consisted of meat-eating meat lovers, so it's hard to avoid a dish without meat. I'm feeling sick all the time because I'm eating so scarcely, and eating really bad stuff like ice cream, candy, and chocolate when I do eat..
I've wanted pale skin for a long time, but living in the sunny state of California is just hectic. I hate the heat, I hate tans, I hate the sun... I've exfoliated my skin like crazy with baking soda, lemons, sea salt, and scrubbing brushes. It's working but my skin feels like it's on fire, the end result will be good, I just know.
I'm also believing I'm asexual, it's dramatic for me, I just don't experience the attraction to be with someone, or date in general. I've also refrained from ever wanting to literally have sex with someone. My friends tell me it's sad to be my age and still be a virgin, but I don't really give a damn. I don't know if it's asexuality or just not wanting to date.
My body is extremely unhealthy right now... yet I'm still skinny and positive which is good.
My mind is getting a bit worse, I'm having a lot of nauseous times in random places, and the hallucinations are coming back.
Yet I still continue to draw, write, and smile. Thanks if you had the time to read this, I appreciate it <3
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