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Hm...what to write. Well I won't be writing much on here until I get high speed internet & THAT won't happen till I move into my new house & THAT won't happen till...ugh....I don't even know anymore & it's driving me INSANE!!! scream Wow...just writing about that actually made me feel better. But that's not the reason I'm feeling bad. Actually, it's guilt i'm feeling. In a nutshell, I had a dream the night before that I hit Justin in the mouth with a wooden longsword. He was bleeding in three different places & looked like he was about to cry.
Yesterday I was at sword practice & I was going against my Justin. He hit me in the leg & let his guard down. but I never felt him hit my leg so I swung...& hit him in the ear. He yelped & fell to the ground clutching his head in pain. Mel & I asked him if he was okay but he never answered. Eventually he got up & was fine.
Now this may sound sick but I never felt bad or sorry for him. It might've been because he's been doing this for a while & has had worse injuries or the fact that he's old enough to take pain like that....I don't know.
But...i woke up at five o'clock in the morning feeling mothing but guilt & I kept seeing the situation over & over again in my head.
& that's where i'm at now, feeling pain & guilt. I know he's okay but... crying