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This is the time in which I will enlighten you with my wisdom. Here the laws of the Copy Shop:

Section 1: Regarding "You".

1. You will want to go against this laws.
2. You already did, or pretend you don't care about this laws.
3. You have no idea, but think you do.
4. You believe the client is always right, you are wrong.
5. You will be the instrument of your own destruction.
6. Your life is not as interesting as you think.
7. Your problems are not as important as you think.
9. You are drowning on a glass of water.
10. You are a cheap, pretentious, and egoistic b*****d.

Section 2: Regarding "The Copy Person".

1. The Copy Person is the object of your despite.
2. The Copy Person despite you back.
3. The Copy Person is stressed.
4. The Copy Person can't turn a black and white picture into a colour one, but vice-versa.
5. The Copy Person is trying to help.
6. The Copy Person has two hands, but one body and only one mind.
7. The Copy Person is not here because he/she likes this job.
8. The Copy Person will jump out of here at the first chance.
9. The Copy Person is somehow stealing from the shop.
10. The Copy Person is way better than you believe.

Section 3: Regarding "The Boss".

1. The Boss may have good intends.
2. The Boss good intends will be deluded by reality.
3. The Boss may be a good person.
4. The Boss will still be somehow hated.
5. The Boss should know better about the decisions he/she make, but don't.
6. The Boss is authority, therefore, must be break.
7. The Boss doesn't knows everything; specially about what is going on at the shop.
8. The Boss thinks he/she has the employees by the balls.
9. The Boss will be shocked when he/she realizes Rule 9 of Section 2 is truth.
10. The Boss can only fire an employee once.

Section 4: Regarding "The Machines".

1. All machines hate the employees.
2. All machines are inherently evil.
3. All machines are meant to break when they are most needed.
4. All machines will come back from the repair shop, with revenge.
5. All machines designed for copy are impossible to stop, if using the "stop" button.
6. All machines have features that would make the employees go "Hey! I didn't knew it could do that!".
7. All machines are money pits.
8. All machines will work just fine at the moment the tech-guy comes to check them out because of an emergency.
9. All machines could start a fire at any moment.
10. All machines have to be constantly watched, and feared.

Section 5: Regarding "The Transcriber".

1. The Transcriber does not care.
2. The Transcriber does not remembers you, neither your vaguely described file done "some time ago".
3. The Transcriber will yawn at some point of your long, unnecessary explanation.
4. The Transcriber will charge in advance, whatever you like it or don't.
5. The Transcriber is not responsible you dig your own grave, he/she is just the coup de grace.
6. The Transcriber knows things about you, important things.
7. The Transcriber has worked with Microsoft programs; there is nothing you could do to scare him/her.
8. The Transcriber may type 300 words per minute, but only need 2 seconds to tell you to "******** off".
9. The Transcriber has many other works to do besides yours.
10. The Transcriber hates you because of Rule 10 of Section 1.

Section 6: Miscellaneous.

1. Whoever tells an employee he or she only needs to print "a few pages", when it's dangerously close to the closing hour, is lying, for about 30 to 100 pages of badly formatted and horribly arranged monstrosity.
2. All tech-guys are mother ********, and will rip you off with a faulty repair.
3. Costumers will come in foursomes, with emergencies, just when the employees are about to go lunch.
4. It is bad luck to say: "What a nice, calm day, eh?".
5. There is p0rn on all the computers at the shop.
6. All flash drives have viruses, vicious ones.
7. No costumer has a right sense of time, and they are all in a hurry.
8. Women with fake nails, will try to use them to make noise in order to press on the employees.
9. People will stare at the employees to try to make them hurry.
10. Fear whoever has more than two (2) years working on a Copy Shop.

My wisdom is here. Embrace my teachings.