....................July and August, have been some of the most emotinal straning months I've had in a while.I'm still trying to work up the nerve to fix things with a someone that I really want back in my life.I just hope she'll be kind enough to give me a second chance.If she doesn't I understand.I can be so stuidp and immature for my age.I still have alot to learn.My fiance got fired from his job at Six Flags the day after his birthday and we were worried that his parents were gonna kick him out.I also found out that my stepmom has 2 stage ovarian cancer and will have to go through kimo.I don't know if thats how you spell it but if she does then I've told her that if she wants I'll shave my head with her.All she needs to do is ask.And I've been at my house alone for lond periods of time and its caused me to break down alot but I will power on even though all of these things going through my head have caused me to have mood swings and to lash out at people.I don't think I've ever been as angry, confused, and sad like this ever since my grandfather died and I flipped out in my study hall class back in high school.I really really want things to get better and I need to calm down and take things one step at a time.
Anyway going to some good news.................I got my N. Italy wig a few weeks ago and a the photoshoot is being planned for a casual Hetalia outing at Six Flags Fright Fest.Shawn got a new job at a WlaMart so everything is a-ok.I just need a job now.Hehehehe.i'm working on it.I almost thought I had one at Build a Bear but I doubt they'll hire me.I just need to power on and keep my families spirits up.I'll also keep my own up my thinking of my idol, Makoto Nagano.I really do hope I didn't get any of you guys down by reading this but I haven't posted anything for a while so i wanted to give everyone an update, no matter how depressing or annoying it was.Anyway, I'll talk to you guys later.
~Ren
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